day in a life

My mom is the worrying type. If nothing bad is going on to worry about she makes something up. Right now she is worried about my brother and his relationship with his ex(?). But she is always telling us what we need to do and make sure we get what we want and need but she doesn't do it herself. I know it's easier to tell everybody else what to do and harder to follow your own advice. She makes herself the victim a lot. She says things in a way that make her sound like she is doing everything she can but nobody gives her a hand to help. If we agree with our stepdad on some subjects she gets mad and tells me that we always take his side.

When did I get so old I have to think about my moms relationship?! I think I'm still way to young to listen to that!

Anyway my brother invited her to dinner tonight and she usually listens to him, sometimes I say things 20 times and then he says it once and she's like 'yeah your right'. Well I am the youngest so this must be a part of the job.

I am still on holiday, my boy will start school on the 22 of August and I will start mine on the 3 of September. I am really looking forward to it.

I got back into a reading gear a few days ago. I'm reading Dracula and enjoying it immensely. love that book, I am also reading Evgeny Onegin and love that too. I will go back to Anna Karenina but right now I am gonna try and finish these two.

I was so mad at my ex yesterday. It was a holiday, this weekend always has Monday off too and there are festivals all over the country. My boy went to his dads house on Friday, he couldn't pick him up 'till after dinner and that was OK. He told me they would just take it easy on Monday and we'd talk in the afternoon. I thought that was great cause he usually has the boy just as much as he needs to and hardly ever more than that. I don't really care about that cause the boy is happy to see him every other weekend. Anyways he called me at ten yesterday morning and his wife was gonna take her son to the movies at one (my boy had already seen the film) so he wanted to bring him to me at the same time. I know him I lived with him for 5 years, he just wanted to go to car dealerships or do something with his car and couldn't bring our son with him. He never spends any time alone with him anymore. I had made plans for the day but I always want my son home so I just said OK. I called my mom very annoyed because I knew that when he would bring the boy over he'd come in for coffee and stay for a very long time, he always does!!!! I am getting so tired of that but I don't want to say anything that will make him upset cause things have been going so well in general. A few minuets before one he came. I didn't invite him in and started off by telling the boy we were gonna go meet grandma. Then my ex asks if he can come in for a cup of coffee. I said OK, and made coffee. He talks and talks then I start getting ready to go out and my mom calls and I tell her I'll be over soon. Then my brother calls and says he wants to meet us all and I say yes very soon. My ex doesn't get the hints. He asks for more coffee, at that moment my son is hungry and since he was gonna eat I made more coffee.

Oh my god I finally got him out the door after an hour! I know I will never say anything, I'll just let it slide cause I want more to keep things good. I also know that the only thing that will stop this is if I had a boyfriend. But that isn't happening anytime soon so I'll just have to deal with this for some time.


Communicating with people is very tricky and I sometimes feel like I have to walk a fine line and bite my cheek to keep things civil. Sometimes life is like a sitcom and I just need a laughing machine in the background so everybody can make fun of this situation.