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Virgil

We Are Off

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Ok, weíre set. Tomorrow weíre off, into the wild blue yonder of half way around the world to a place as remote and ancient as anywhere in the world, a place where westerners crossed over as part of the silk road to China, a place Marco Polo could have felt comfortable, though he didnít cross that way, a place where the first horses were supposed to have been domesticated, a culture over the centuries mixed with Mongols and Turks and Cossacks and Persians and Chinese, a vast land mostly of steppe on the one hand and mountains on the other. The Russians took over Kazakhstan and then the Soviets dominated them, but they could not obliterate the Kazak culture. They insisted on independence and their particular culture has re-sprouted. This is as different a place I have ever been to. Iíve never been anywhere where I at least couldnít get by with the language. I know two words (thatís two as in one, two) of Russian and nothing of Kazak. I canít even sound out the Cyrillic alphabet. I am literally going to another world.

And the trip will be brutal. We leave for the airport by mid afternoon tomorrow, wait for a early evening flight to Frankfurt, which will take eight hours, have a seven hour layover in Germany, then a seven hour flight to Almaty, the big city of Kazakhstan, which gets us in at midnight local time. Then we have to wait until about eight oíclock for our final flight to Shymkent, which should take about two hours. We arrive at our destination on mid Monday morning: total travel time just a mere 32 hours. Just.

And the whole reason we are doing this insanity is for this little one that is waiting for us to pick him and give him a home. This will be my child, my little one that I will hold in my heart for ever. Three years after we started this process and we will meet our child for the first time. Finally we will meet. We were longing for this little one before he was even born. Destiny is funny. Fate isnít always fickle. The great Roman emperors of the first and second century were all adopted. What isnít ours by conception is ours by love.

As many of you know, the process has not been easy. And itís not just the difficulty thatís the hardship. One climbs Mount Everest from base station to peak in about a month, perhaps two. One adopts a child in the span of years. Itís been long and there were definitely moments where we didnít think it would happen. The paperwork was endless, even mindless sometimes. I guess there are reasons for all of it. I guess. And itís still not over. My wife today was still running around Fed Exing crap and we have left stuff with my mother-in-law to address while weíre out there bonding with that little child. Parenthood is way easier than dealing with bureaucracies.

There is an interesting development on the process once weíre out there. The original process that was dictated to us was that once we selected the child, which is expected that first day, though I donít know what kind of shape weíll be in after 32 hours of travel, we have several weeks of bonding period with the child, and then initial court appearances. That was to be the first month. At that point I was going to return home while my wife would stay out there with the child and her mother would come out to keep her company. It would take another three to four weeks for the final legal transfer and I was going to fly back out there for the final transaction and the happy family would return as a group. That is still an option.

What they are offering is a better option in many respects but worrisome also. The first month is the same; we are both there for the bonding and the initial court appearances. But then we both come home and the final legal transactions will be performed by our agency contact in Kazakhstan Ė his name is Oleg Ė and then he will personally transport the baby across the world over to us. Now this is certainly much cheaper, my wife will not have to stay and maintain an apartment for another month, and Olegís flight is a tradeoff to my return flight. But Iím concerned about leaving my child in the care of anyone. And though he comes with a good reputation from my agency, and they swear heís done this many times before Ė three or four times a year actually Ė I donít know him from a hole in the wall. And what if either intentionally or not they give they send the wrong child over? What then? We donít have to make this decision until weíre out there, so Iíve put it off. Iíll have to assess Oleg myself when I see him. What do others think?

So this is my last blog for now, and with luck and technology I hope I can log on from out there. I still have some packing to do, and final reading decisions to make for the trip. Iíll be writing a daily journal and taking lots of pictures and hopefully if I can figure out how to work the video camera some movie clips. If I can post I will post. Hold us in your prayers.
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  1. qimissung's Avatar
    I am really touched and moved, Virgil, that you and pussnboots made the decision to include us in your journey. Thank you. I say again, you guys will be fantastic parents.

    Your words here as beautiful and moving as anything I have ever read. I love children. I love my children and everything about having them and raising them and seeing them off into the world, and I ask God's blessing on you and your wife as you begin this most amazing and fantastic journey. May it be everything, everything and more that you thought it would be.

    I think it will.
  2. Janine's Avatar
    I feel the same as qim. She said it so perfectly. I certainly feel honored to have followed you and pussnboots entries on this adventure. I am praying for your safety and for the little ones. I guess you have to play it by ear and see what the people there are like and how honest they seem. I would probably have qualms about them bringing you the child but my cousin (some 30 yrs back) adopted from Korea and they did bring the child to her. Just take it day by day. I am sure it will be a life altering experience. I like that you gave a little history of the place. I will look it up online and research it as well. Happiness to you and your wife when you meet your little loved one.
  3. mtpspur's Avatar
    May God continue to bless you both in this journey. I know for the two of you this has been a long time coming and yet now that I know you'll be getting on that plane tomorrow I sit here and wonder where the time went. Hopefully your fears about Oleg will be put to rest upn meeting him. Looking forward to the happy end and the new beginning to your lives. God bless and be safe.
  4. BienvenuJDC's Avatar
    Wow, it was hard for us to leave (a 45 minute drive) from Hershey Medical Center. We were able to visit her everyday. Of course, being hooked to all the machines added a different stress. I can't imagine leaving your child in another country. However, your child will be in the best of hands...His Hands. I will be praying for you continually.
  5. Buh4Bee's Avatar
    Very exciting to hear this day has finally arrived! Travel safe! Look forward to hearing more of the story and hearing about your child.
  6. motherhubbard's Avatar
    The most exciting experience of your life is before you. Well, the most exciting, frightening, joyous, heartbreaking, difficult, rewarding, tiresome, exhilarating, and completely indescribable experience of your life is before you. Congratulations to you and your wife. You have the hearts of a mother and father and I can just imagine your faces when your hearts swell to bursting on Monday. I will be thinking of you and praying for you. But, I have been all along. I'm so happy for you. Thank you for sharing this experience.
  7. 1n50mn14's Avatar
    Still so much stress, but this is so real all of a sudden. You're flying across the world, and will soon be home with a baby! Congratulations, guys.
  8. *Classic*Charm*'s Avatar
    It's been a long, hard journey, but how worth it will it be once you've got the little angel in your arms? I can't wait to see photos of your new family! Best of luck to you both!
  9. applepie's Avatar
    Much love to you both and the little one who will soon be joining your family.

    Love,
    Meg
  10. Madhuri's Avatar
    Good Luck to you both. Looking forward to see the pictures I am sure even after such a long journey you won't feel tired once you have a look at your bundle of joy. It sounds so exciting
  11. TheFifthElement's Avatar
    Good luck on your trip Virgil & pussnboots. It's a long way but I'm sure it'll be worth it.
  12. Helga's Avatar
    good luck you guys this is a wonderful thing your doing and I am sure it will go well
  13. Scheherazade's Avatar
    Finally!

    Good luck and take care!

  14. Lacra's Avatar
    May God be with you and hope you both will be back with your so long waited baby!
  15. Paulclem's Avatar
    All the best Virgil and Pussnboots. It'll be some story to tell your child in later years.
  16. ClaesGefvenberg's Avatar
    There you are... on your way at last. Like I said I can't wait to hear your tale when you get back home. Good luck to all three of you.

    /Claes
  17. Pendragon's Avatar
    Wishing you and Boots all the best. I am certain that this child will be going to a loving, caring home. I cannot think of two people more qualifed to be parents. Be praying for you.
  18. PrinceMyshkin's Avatar
    Oh, how I'd love to be there, invisible, as you and Puss first glimpse the face, the figure of your new child! Or if I could have a snapshot of either or both your hearts at that moment!
  19. Virgil's Avatar
    We're on on way. No time to thank you all individually. Thank you all for your well wishes. Hope to be back on in a few days. See ya!
  20. Petrarch's Love's Avatar
    Godspeed my friend. Good luck with your adventure to lands remote and I can't wait to hear that you are holding your beloved child at last.
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