Help

[Slane]

I have a school project that i have to have poems. ANd i deciede to write my own.

I AM NOT A WRITER.

So i need some help majorly

I ahve written some poems but i need to know after i write one if someone could tell me if it is good.

This is the first it is a free verse.

The darkness is overwhelming
The light fights with all power
But it cannot succeeded
As the last spark disappears
The light is engulfed by darkness

[Shea]

Is this a religious peom? Believe it or not I once wrote one very similar, only my light kept on going.

I think you have a good foundation, but maybe try to use a little more imagry and/or symbolism. Don't be afraid to "steal" lines from other poems if it helps. It's a particular style of poetry but I can't remember the name of it. My poetry teacher encouraged us to do that at one point.

[waxmephilosophical]

Also, you should change 'succeeded' to 'suceed'...keep it in present tense.

[Slane]

thanks so far i tried to write so over stuff ut i don't now if it is good

[chrissy]

I like your poem for the message itself, but you could try to add a bit of style to the words like 'darkness is devoring' or add a bit of rhythm to it.

[Slane]

thanks well i go tmostly everything done now except for the figurative lanuage which i absolutly hate buti do for a grade. I am sticking arounf here i like this place

[chrissy]

you should post the final draft of your poem. What do you mean by figurative language? I'll help if I can. D

[Shea]

Hey Slane! I'm glad your sticking around, but some of your posts are hard to understand, can you fix your typoes?