An Anarchist Battle Cry

[Revolte]

Call out the men and women blacked
in sweaters, hoods and masks,
give them fist and bottled flame
and watch the dogs fall back,
while smoking streets and charring cars
scream these dreams we seek,
the hands of gold will thus unfold
as the cities burn to creeks.

[hillwalker]

'give them fist and bottled flame' is a good line - reminding me of the Paris student riots of the late 60's rather than more contemporary disorder.

I'm not so sure that the last 3 lines make a lot of sense - internal and end rhyme employed at the expense of clarity of expression.

H

[PrinceMyshkin]

There was for me an irresistible insurgent rage until...

the cities burn to creeks
? What on earth can that mean? And how is it - insofar as this is written from within an Anarchist's POV - how is that a fitting transformation of these presumably oppressive cities?

[Revolte]

There was for me an irresistible insurgent rage until...

the cities burn to creeks
? What on earth can that mean? And how is it - insofar as this is written from within an Anarchist's POV - how is that a fitting transformation of these presumably oppressive cities?

lol, it just means the cities going away and nature popping up, or if you wanna just let it be some sort of acid trip, molting buildings muahhahha.

anyway the last two lines where supposed to represent the fall of capitalism and modern civilization.

I grew up around creeks rather then lakes or oceans or rivers, so thats probably why I chose to use creeks rather then anything that would have been more clear. by the time i got to cars being on fire my mind went into picture mode and i just wrote what i saw, and sense I've always lived in the country I associate creeks with open land.

marsh creek for example is beautiful, right on the side of Mt. Diablo, which can be one of the most beautiful volcanoes, but low and behold right beside it lies concord.

[dyne7]

the poem is raw and doesn't care about the consequences of its minimal brutality. consider lengthening it a bit. subject matter is intense. good use of senses.