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View Full Version : Poems where you're not really trying.



NikolaiI
09-18-2010, 02:08 AM
Okay, specifically, poems where you're not really trying to be competitive. You're not really trying to be better than someone else. Poems where you're not writing for anyone, not anyone at all, but yourself. I could put this in the personal poetry section but those poems are where people are trying more than anything. So a poem without, completely and totally, without any part of the motive being to write better than somoene else, a poem like this isn't necessarily bad, in fact it's necessarily much better. It doesn't have to not have anything else, the only thing it has to not have is trying to be better than someone else.

So be creative. But no condescending, and no criticism of someone else's poem - except for the judge. And the judge shouldn't criticize in a customary fashion. You have to make up a totally unique and creative reason for why you say something is good, why it chooses to win.

The underlying idea here is that you write something for yourself, absolutely and only for yourself, so that you don't even consider that it may be read by another. What's considered the best poem should be based on a reason the judge comes up with that also has nothing to do with any others, they've got complete sovereignty in their decision.

Basically the guidelines are there but they're undefinable. They're undefinable because we're evolving beings, and this is an evolving game / poetry thread. Have you got it? The only rules are is the judge sets the start of the next poems, and calls the time at about a week or so, and then makes their decision, and whoever wins will be the next judge.

So again - the only criteria for poems is you have to write a poem that you are not trying to be better than anyone else. Why? So the poems will be valuable, meaningful - poems written out of fear of being thought inferior to someone are worthless. At least here. These have to be written with only the exploration of the individual poem, that is, exploring to find the heart and the truth of it. It may take a long time to get away from our former selves, fearing to not appear superior to others - but it will be worth it. If it seems necessary to write something which will absolutely seem like trash to someone's condescending taste - then write that poem. It may be the judge will see what you meant to put in there, and choose your poem. The reason of this thread is to write really good poems - free from thought of what others think - to explore the possibilities of poetry.

Time for each contest should be about a week.

The first person to post will be the first judge.

NikolaiI
09-18-2010, 11:09 AM
Okay, well a friend told me 1 week would be far too short, so the time can be any amount. It just always seemed to me on the other ones that the time limit was so far away, like 2 weeks away and seemed way too long, when there were already 10 posts or so. But if it should be longer that's fine.

The first judge post is still open. :p

PrinceMyshkin
09-18-2010, 11:19 AM
Okay, well a friend told me 1 week would be far too short, so the time can be any amount. It just always seemed to me on the other ones that the time limit was so far away, like 2 weeks away and seemed way too long, when there were already 10 posts or so. But if it should be longer that's fine.

The first judge post is still open. :p

Nikolai, this sound really interesting though I have some skepticism really your essential premise: no competitiveness and yet... you're asking foe "judges," which makes this inherently competitive. If I accepted your invitation to be the 2nd judge, what criteria should I be applying? Anyway, I'll be following this with interest.

NikolaiI
09-18-2010, 11:44 PM
I meant the invitation for you to be first judge. Maybe I should be the first judge then. You could write the first poem. :)

Okay here's the criteria for judging: whatever poem is most perfect. And the criteria can't be what anyone else has written that art should be, it is just what the judge feels is best. The poems shouldn't be trying to conform to any standard except the truth which is in them once they've begun. The best poem is whatever poem is truest to itself. But, in writing them, you don't even have to be trying to write a poem that's the most true to itself.

Basically the rules are there, but they are loose, and evolving - just as everything is in change, so these rules are not static, but are organic and evolving. The goal itself is not a permanent, unchanging, goal, but an evolving one. Everything here is evolving and exceeding itself. So write poems that are absolutely true to themselves, and that's it. One guideline which is suggested here is that they're written with on one else in mind.

I guess, though it seems like an exceedingly long time from now, the judging date will be October 18th, any time during that day, and the judge will be either Prince or myself.

Begin! :)

PrinceMyshkin
09-19-2010, 08:32 AM
I'm not sure whether this is complying with the rules because the following was written rather a long time ago and I've already posted it here in another thread:




INTIMATIONS


A shiver of something quick
goes through us now and then,
as if
the misaligned heart


were about to fracture under bone
or, far off in outer space,
a silent planet thinned itself
against the dark, unknown.




J. Newman Sudden Proclamations copyright 1992

Years ago, when I had long stopped writing poems, I was driving somewhere when I felt the nudge - a sort of wordless rhythm - of what I recognized as a poem that was waiting to be written. As soon as I could, I pulled over, got out a pad and a pen, ready to work out this promising new poem, but--

found that I could not write it, because I already had! It was the above poem and I could not remember how it had come to me and felt, if it hadn't been written already, I could not have written it now!

If I subsequently write a poem that subscribes to the guidelines you've set out, I will post it here. It's a tall, but interesting order, because for as long as I can remember, everything I've written has been with the assumption of a reader.

NikolaiI
09-19-2010, 01:05 PM
Thanks, Prince! :)

NikolaiI
02-09-2015, 04:49 PM
Prince wins the title of first judge, and the winner of the first contest! as he was the only contestant. :)

Wow, I still really like this idea. Anybody want to be the first judge of this contest?

YesNo
02-09-2015, 11:00 PM
I'll be a judge. Now we need some poems! Deadline: last day of February.

NikolaiI
02-11-2015, 11:15 PM
Thanks, YesNo! :-)

I'll go ahead and start.


I think I'll call me
a little blue light-
Letting go of the sky,
but i still think i'm blue.
My little lovely self,
when I was just a sprite
was happy as an elf,
and sang in half-delight-
but now i hear the song;
this day, in '68,
on this summer day clear,
in this beautiful year.

YesNo
02-12-2015, 06:21 AM
Great, NikolaiI! This guarantees there will be a winner at the end of February.

Here's one of mine right off the top of the unconscious. It's not for the contest, but just to keep the thread going. It is about 4 am and I just woke up.


Fighting With One’s Muse

My muse told me she’s had her fill
of my BS. She’s off somewhere.
I could have told her, “Cutie, chill.”
I would have, but she isn’t there.

slipee
02-13-2015, 06:32 AM
the tide recedes
so we take a snapshot
the rippled sands; from our balloon
we crop a piece
and play it like a record
a needle in the groove
but the music of the ocean sands
was such a sorry tale
and now we know
for shore

-I had this idea to one day make an art piece that utilised this concept. Now I've let it slip and someone else will probably do it. That's OK because I have plenty more. I didn't try to make it fit into any proper poetic structure but moreso be a platform to express an idea in short lines. These lines in succession tentatively cling to eachother as if to admit they'll never evolve into the true potential of this idea.

(I wrote the poem in just a few minutes and didn't really try! The concept, however...well)

YesNo
02-13-2015, 10:53 AM
Thanks, slipee! Now this is a real contest.

We need more entries!

cacian
02-25-2015, 06:44 AM
i like the idea so here we go

in despair
we like
to air
happyness rare
we pretend we care
we know not unfair

in reverse
jollier swears
we pour out scares and
let out blaires
we look revived
but
feel denied

the meaning of happy
is a stable savy
to move it
according to be
is the reason why we see
blind may disagree
but the feeling is free

YesNo
02-25-2015, 09:08 AM
Nice one, cacian! That makes three entries. The contest ends at the end of this month. There is still time to enter!

cacian
02-26-2015, 05:58 AM
Nice one, cacian! That makes three entries. The contest ends at the end of this month. There is still time to enter!

YesNo thank you :)

YesNo
03-01-2015, 10:08 AM
The deadline is past. Thank you for the entries!

NikolaiI: A nice poem about the beauty of the moment. I liked the idea of the light letting go of the sky.

slipee: An interesting idea of playing the grooves the waves make on a sandy beach and finding the story sad then the "shore" rather than the expected sure word at the end.

cacian: Nice sound. I liked the line about the "blind may disagree" the best.

The winner of this round in the "Poems where you're not really trying" contest is cacian!

cacian
03-03-2015, 03:26 AM
why thank you YesNo:)

so let's have another round 'of poems you have not really tried'

please keep them coming and this time let's perhaps put a limit on the number of line just to spice it up a bit
how about No MORE then 12 lines.

Good Luck!!

YesNo
03-03-2015, 09:51 AM
What I see, it isn’t there,
And what I don’t is everywhere.
My past and future won’t move on
Before my present moment’s gone.

cacian
03-12-2015, 03:35 AM
we need more of the same
YesNo your piece is cool :)

slipee
05-23-2015, 11:46 AM
If I were you
and you were me
and I were you once more
and this went on
for days and days
and ended, nothing more
would you remember anything?
was it even any more...
than my imagination's
cruel creations
knocking at my door