View Full Version : My poem. =]

01-01-2010, 01:28 AM
Heey, so this is a poem I wrote for my grandmother when she passed away. I'd really appreciate comments, be honest, I'd like to know what I can improve. Thanks.

She flew away,
like a dove in the sky.
With all of us down here,
as we said goodbye,
We loved her dearly,
and we love her still.
She was so brave,
she had such a strong will.
She was fighting,
Right till the end,
but she couldn’t hold out,
she finally gave in.
She left in the morning,
at exactly six o-clock.
When the clouds parted,
and the rain,
finally stopped.
It was a sad time,
for all of us there.
And as we packed up our stuff,
and headed out the door,
a dove in the tree,
just sat there and stared.
In no time at all,
it was joined by another.
And while they sat there together,
I remembered my Nan.
And all the fun,
that we had.
As I watched her fly away,
with the other,
into the clouds.
I realized,
I saw god that day.