JackShea
03-05-2007, 08:15 PM
Must have forgot I took it! Most embarrassing. Wife drew a nice warm bath and suggested a bottle of champagne for our date. That’s what we call it now. A date. We don’t go anywhere but we both believe it a mood enhancer if we plan a night of not going out. We look forward to our disillusionment. I was only too pleased to add to our fantasy so I...
Arrived at the store and decided to add to the Champagne order. Some cheese and French bread ought to do it. Might even get a blow job if I dazzle her with my culinary purchases. Grabbed a cart and started pushing. Decided some fruit might be in order. Grapes would be perfect. Watch the juice drip down my darling’s lips. A turn-on, that. Have to hurry though. Want to be there when she emerges from the tub. Take the towel and dry her off. If I want to make points I brush her hair. Soft smooth even strokes followed by a blow dry. And then...
I suppose I could try and be macho and say it happened while fondling the cucumbers but in reality it was while checking out the asparagus tips when it hit. Forgot I took it! Rose to the occasion it did. Reminded me of my military days. “ attention!”.. refuses the command, “At ease!” Embarrassing. Didn’t need the little blue pill. Thought I would take it for yuks. Ha! Ha! Not funny. What to do now! Pull the shopping cart close to my body. No one can see it and I keep walking. Got to keep walking. Walk it off. Here we go. Up one aisle and down another. Fourth time I have passed the corn flakes. I feel a presence behind me and turn and gaze into her suspicious smiling face. “Can I help you find something, sir?” Night manager. Thinks I am a shoplifter. Want to tell her no, I don’t need to find something but, if you can help me lose something, I would be most grateful. But I merely grin back and say, “No thanks, just looking” onward I move. Up the aisle, down the aisle. How long will this last? Forgot to read the directions. It can’t last forever. Can it? God I hope not. The manager tails me and I grab a can of Alpo off the shelf to distract her. One of these days I might get a dog. Jesus, now it is throbbing! Is it supposed to do that? Why couldn’t I just let nature take its course? What time is it? Maybe I should call the wife. What would I tell her? Sorry love. Might be a little late. Something came up. No, can’t do that. She would bust a gut. Wives are very amused at their mate’s faux pas. And then...
I checked my watch. I have been in this store for forty five minutes and still no shrinking violet. God, this cannot be a permanent pose. Reminds me of Mother’s warning. Wipe that grin off your face before it freezes in a permanent moronic portrait.” The manager stills dogs me. I cannot check out. How would it look standing before the cashier with my you know what...never mind. Oh, oh. Here she comes! She catches up to me! “Sir,” she says, “You seem lost. Do you have a question I might answer for you?” I scratch my head. The one on top of my shoulders. Do I have a question? “As a matter of fact I do,” I say. “How long are you open?”
“Why sir,” she smiles with that corporate grin, “For you convenience we are open all night.” Praise the Lord I muse. “Would you excuse me young lady, I have to keep walking.”
The End
Arrived at the store and decided to add to the Champagne order. Some cheese and French bread ought to do it. Might even get a blow job if I dazzle her with my culinary purchases. Grabbed a cart and started pushing. Decided some fruit might be in order. Grapes would be perfect. Watch the juice drip down my darling’s lips. A turn-on, that. Have to hurry though. Want to be there when she emerges from the tub. Take the towel and dry her off. If I want to make points I brush her hair. Soft smooth even strokes followed by a blow dry. And then...
I suppose I could try and be macho and say it happened while fondling the cucumbers but in reality it was while checking out the asparagus tips when it hit. Forgot I took it! Rose to the occasion it did. Reminded me of my military days. “ attention!”.. refuses the command, “At ease!” Embarrassing. Didn’t need the little blue pill. Thought I would take it for yuks. Ha! Ha! Not funny. What to do now! Pull the shopping cart close to my body. No one can see it and I keep walking. Got to keep walking. Walk it off. Here we go. Up one aisle and down another. Fourth time I have passed the corn flakes. I feel a presence behind me and turn and gaze into her suspicious smiling face. “Can I help you find something, sir?” Night manager. Thinks I am a shoplifter. Want to tell her no, I don’t need to find something but, if you can help me lose something, I would be most grateful. But I merely grin back and say, “No thanks, just looking” onward I move. Up the aisle, down the aisle. How long will this last? Forgot to read the directions. It can’t last forever. Can it? God I hope not. The manager tails me and I grab a can of Alpo off the shelf to distract her. One of these days I might get a dog. Jesus, now it is throbbing! Is it supposed to do that? Why couldn’t I just let nature take its course? What time is it? Maybe I should call the wife. What would I tell her? Sorry love. Might be a little late. Something came up. No, can’t do that. She would bust a gut. Wives are very amused at their mate’s faux pas. And then...
I checked my watch. I have been in this store for forty five minutes and still no shrinking violet. God, this cannot be a permanent pose. Reminds me of Mother’s warning. Wipe that grin off your face before it freezes in a permanent moronic portrait.” The manager stills dogs me. I cannot check out. How would it look standing before the cashier with my you know what...never mind. Oh, oh. Here she comes! She catches up to me! “Sir,” she says, “You seem lost. Do you have a question I might answer for you?” I scratch my head. The one on top of my shoulders. Do I have a question? “As a matter of fact I do,” I say. “How long are you open?”
“Why sir,” she smiles with that corporate grin, “For you convenience we are open all night.” Praise the Lord I muse. “Would you excuse me young lady, I have to keep walking.”
The End