Alphabetical Story Game

[ajoe]

Wanna try to play this game? I saw it on another board.
The idea is to form a story from random sentences. However, each sentence needs to start with the next letter the previous sentence starts with.

For example, if I start out with
A month ago, I went to Paris.

Then the next sentence will be
Before I knew it, yada yada yada.

OK, here goes:

A month ago, I went to Paris.

[amuse]

Been a long time since we visited that beautiful town in Texas.

[Isagel]

Circumstances I will not speak of, made us leave.

[IWilKikU]

Digression, I apologize, anyways, Paris; what can I say about Paris other than it was one of those most beautiful weekends that ever unfolded, mostly in thanks to mysterious porclain penguin salesman I met there and the wisdom he shared with me.

[fayefaye]

Except I can no longer remember it, as my memory fades with time... people leave, porcelain shatters, time moves on... and on...

[Cassandra]

Forever, until paris is but a distant myth lost in time and the wisdom i learned there has been long forgotten.

[IWilKikU]

Give me but a moment and I'll remember; oh yes, the porclain penguin; I purchased it because it looked so much like the Pope that I felt the need to kiss its toe.

[Cassandra]

However at that moment at that moment I saw the real pope going for afternoon tea so I used the wisdom given to me by the porclain seller.

[IWilKikU]

If only I could recall what that wisdom was...

[Cassandra]

Just a minute I've got it :) ! Nope it's gone again. :(

[ajoe]

King Kufa crossed my mind as I was thinking hard.

[amuse]

Languidly, I rolled onto my stomach: and there, there it was!

[Lara]

Monstrous was the bug that faced me eye-to-eye!

[IWilKikU]

Nothing I could do would destract the fiendish bug from the bag of Doritoes that its multifaceted eyes danced across.

[ajoe]

Oh, my! He had everything gone in one gulp!

[Lara]

Proclaiming my intentions with a cry of war, I smashed that bug, ground my heel into the floor!

[atiguhya padma]

Quietly, I turned around and saw, as if from on high, a queue: it surreally formed letters which read 'Amuse will miss this Q'.:)

[ajoe]

"Run!" I suddenly heard myself. "Run for your life!"

[atiguhya padma]

So I stood there, and the sun stripped me of my matter, and my skin and bones and blood dissolved into endless streams of colour that ran all over the city of Paris, which had also become an American town, and people became stuck in the gooey substance, that ever expanded like a layer of pliable multi-coloured SWEET CHEESE

[papayahed]

That'll show them all, those mocking, chiding, behemouth citizens of Paris.

[Jay]

Until then everything looks good, but the last day was really a day when everything that could go wrong, did.

[Shea]

Vacuuming up the gooey cheese, the pope realized he couldn't remember any of his languages, while pocelain penguin did a dance for him to reencarnate the bug, creating utter chaos.

[IWilKikU]

Windex wielding wanderers weaved thier whethered winged wildabeasts into a mouth watering wicked watergate-esque scandal that revolved around the Pope and his hoover associating with reencartation-believing porcelain penguin HEATHENS.

[Lara]

Xylophone! the Pope exclaimed. I wish to learn to play the Xylophone to calm the windex weilding wanderers and the winged wildebeasts and the porcelain penguin heathens!

[imthefoolonthehill]

yard by yard, he slew the winged wildebeasts and porcelain penguin heathens.

[atiguhya padma]

Zeus! cried the Pope, and in good observance of some obscure OT moral code, the crowd fell upon the Pope and slew him for blasphemy.

[Shea]

Is that it? Do we start again? That was fun! I really thought the story somewhat ironic to me because I actually did see the pope when I went to Paris. I even wrote a poem about it once.

[ajoe]

;) It doesn't really matter. We can start a new story or pick up where this ends. In the other board I saw, it's a never-ending story that by now is completely unrelated to the first sentence that began it all.

[atiguhya padma]

OK. I'll start again.

And the sky rained frogs, that hatched from oval stones, and the people took this as a sign that the Pope's death was wrong in the eyes of God (but the frogs praised God for the Pope's sacrifice).

[Shea]

Because the people refused to beleive the frogs, the bits of oval stone continued to fall, smiting the people over their heads.

[Lara]

Climaxing with a heavenly burst of oval stones, the people bruised and battered, fell to their knees in prayer.

[atiguhya padma]

During this celestial bombardment, a campanologist hiding underneath the lemon tree, believed he heard his favourite bell ringing.

[Lara]

Engrossed by the musical sound, he raised himself from the ground, walked past the people praying on their knees towards the melodious choir as more bells began ringing through all of Paris.

[Cassandra]

Centuries later people were to find these skulls with stones in them and wonder at their significance. They were assumed to part of a religious festival of a highly barbaric culture.

[amuse]

F, y'all

[atiguhya padma]

Godot finally arrived to find nothing but three decomposing bodies amid an audience that had long since asphyxiated.

[IWilKikU]

<<<<<No, Cassandra started her sentance with a C, when we were supposed to be on F. Amuse was pointing out that we missed F, not saying "'F' you". >>>>>

[ajoe]

<<<For all the wrong reason I find that amusing!!! :D :D :D >>>

[amuse]

<<<Whoo! Thanks, Kik. what a funny thing to read. Of all letters to derail on, hunh. Glad you got a laugh, ajoe :)>>>

[Shea]

From an observation of the Greek style dramatic masks the three were wearing, Godot realized they had all been gassed from a device issuing from the mouths.

[Shea]

Hearing his favorite bell, he realized also that it was sounded to cover the sounds of these dying people!

[Shea]

<<<I'm having a really hard time keeping a straight face about that 'f' thing!! It was so out of character for amuse that I was stunned at first then cracked up when kik explained!>>>

[Shea]

<<<I have to get out of here, I'm in a public library and my laughing is quite embarassing! Thanks amuse, I needed that!:D >>>

[Cassandra]

Originally posted by IWilKikU
<<<<<No, Cassandra started her sentance with a C, when we were supposed to be on F. Amuse was pointing out that we missed F, not saying "'F' you". >>>>>

:o (Sorry confused again):confused:

[ajoe]

<<<Here's a darn good emoticon we should have when this kind of things happen. http://www.addis-welt.de/smilie/smilie/lachen/12.gif>>>

[Lara]

Ya Ajoe! Where are we supposed to be now? LOL

[atiguhya padma]

In my opinion, we should start here.

[Cassandra]

((Thanx!))

[IWilKikU]

Jacket potatoes went whizzing by my head in every direction except up.

[ajoe]

Krispy Treats instead of water poured down from the sky!

[amuse]

Lilting-voiced lionesses lazily sipped lemonade by the lakeside, eating tiny little lemon parfaits and losing their inhibitions.

[imthefoolonthehill]

my mom stared at us. It was the most embarrassing moment in our entire marriage.

[amuse]

"Now I know," she said, "that I should never have stopped doing yoga."

[IWilKikU]

Overzealous I gripped a jacket potato in one hand and a krispy treat in the other and proceeded to bash my red faced mother in the face with the deliceous dinner peices.

[Cassandra]

Powerless as she at first appeared, she quickly struck back, grinding food into my nostrels.

[IWilKikU]

Quizically I blinked my eyes at her wondering why she would do such a thing to the son she spent years rearing and readying for life in the real world.

[Cassandra]

Realising I could not breathe and had little time left to live I left these thoughts for later, blowing hard to clear my airways.

[ajoe]

"Son," she sniffed, "I love you, you know."

[Cassandra]

'To bad,' I replied, ' you should have thought of that earlier.' As I continued to bash her with delicious dinner pieces.

[Shea]

Unfortunatly, a giant squirrel, attracted by the sugary treats came scampering heavily out of the nearby woods.

[ajoe]

Very immediately he reached for my food and grinned.

[Shea]

"Watch out!" I yelled, but it had already tripped over it's enormous teeth and rolled right over my mom.

[atiguhya padma]

x marked the spot where they fell.

[ajoe]

"You're as tall as my ex-husband!" my mom told the squirrel.

[atiguhya padma]

Zoltan the squirrel, grabbed the confection, looked quizzically at the woman who so admired his stature, and scarpered away into the nearby woods, leaving her and her children ajoe and shea, to look upon this in astonishment:)

[ajoe]

And upon this sentimental moment, the sky cried once again, and this time rocks instead of Krispy Treats poured down!

[amuse]

Brotherly love overcoming all, pebbles and rocks wiped their tears away, and cavorted in diners drinking tiny coffee creamers and syrup-puddled pancakes all night long.

[Shea]

Chatting lively, the diners wondered why most silly stories turned to food. ;)

[ajoe]

Dodging the question, everyone started to talk about the latest books they've read.

[Shea]

"Exactly," said a little 3-year-old from the corner, "the creature's knowledge of Milton is how he obtained the ability to speak so eloquently to Victor Frankentien."

[Isagel]

For a moment, all there was , was silence.

[Sancho]

”Gadzooks!” shrieked Zoltan, the badly anthropomorphized squirrel, from the nearby wood shattering the all too brief silence.

[atiguhya padma]

"Help, someone's pinched my nuts!!" screamed Zoltan.

[Cassandra]

'I'm going to faint now, please excuse me,' said the talking squirrel passing out while somebody fetched the press to view this amazing phenomenon.

[ajoe]

"Just kidding," Zoltan suddenly opened his eyes and grinned mischievously.

[Lara]

Knuckleheads! Shouted Zoltan as he ran off after the perpetrator who stole his nuts.

[Sancho]

Levity was abundant amongst our merry band of woodland revelers as they watched the unfortunate Zoltan limp deeper and deeper into the primeval forest.

[atiguhya padma]

"Man, what am I without my nuts?" moaned Zoltan, as he reflected on a cold and rude awakening from his imminent hibernation.

[Lara]

Naked and dejected feeling, Zoltan sat down under an oak tree and pouted.

[amuse]

"Options I have none," he mourned in prismatic tones, cracking open a moldy acorn with his rusty Leatherman and revealing a startling glimpse of rubies and tears.

[ajoe]

"President Zoltan!" he suddenly heard his name called.

[Jay]

"Quit feeling sorry for yourself and get some work done!" said the same voice to Zoltan.

[atiguhya padma]

Rivers of light streamed down upon poor Zoltan, as he worked his way through the hot and claustrophobic wood.

[amuse]

Sailboats flew past his ear as the waves tossed.

[Sancho]

Tantamount to his quest for nourishment, Zoltan yearned to find the source of the voices of his constituents and to learn the mysterious secret of their nautical transportation which made such a mockery of the laws of gravity.

[atiguhya padma]

"Underneath all these words, lies the true meaning of Zoltan" thought Zoltan to himself, as he sought, in vain, to transcend his miserable existence in a communal short story (knowing full well, that by thinking these thoughts, he could at least force the hand of his creators, and to a small extent, even determine the future of the story his creators had made for him).

[atiguhya padma]

Veneer, that's the word I was looking for, thought Zoltan.

[Sancho]

"Whilst I veneer or shall I tile the bar in my winters' den?"

[atiguhya padma]

"Xmas will soon dawn upon us" thought Zoltan, "rather than decorate, I daresay I'll just drink a dram of whisky and then drowsily snuggle up in my wonderful and beautiful den".

[Sancho]

"Yuk, from whence doth that horrible smell emanateth and why doth I now speaketh in this manner!?"

[atiguhya padma]

Zoltan RIP.

[den]

And the forest wept.

[amuse]

Big, fat, juicy tears plunked and plashed to the ground.

[Cassandra]

Canines, wild and mad, howled in grief before chasing their tails and running away.

[atiguhya padma]

"Death to the dogs" cried the crazed cats that chased them through the dark depth of Cranborne Chase.

[Sancho]

Ermine lit out after the Crazed Cats of Cranborne Chase in a scene strangely contrary to the theories of Charles Darwin.

[atiguhya padma]

Flying overhead, a single plane shown on radar winging across the wood, just airmen delivering mail, a shadow on a wall, a certain sound in the air.

[ajoe]

<<< http://www.addis-welt.de/smilie/smilie/lachen/11.gif I really have lost track where we are! >>>

[Shea]

"Grapes!" shouted the pilot, "Throw them out the window so that we can see what sign the people below will take it as!"

[atiguhya padma]

"Hey, look at that plane in the sk............" SPLAT!!!

[1960]

Irresponsible pilot in the plane so high
Released a load that can't gravity defy.
It stung, it smart, it made me cry
That SPLATT!!! you heard was me losing my eye.
I clean the blood I wipe my socket dry
And a missile from some dead fingers I pry.
I point it at that plane in the sky
I scream in delight I let out a cry.
Iwatch the missile streak up high
Their time is up, their gonna die.
A puff of smoke, a bang, some debris whizzing by
I smile as the plane spirals out of the sky.
It hits the floor the pilot lands nearby
He won't need it now - I cut out his eye.

[atiguhya padma]

Just taking a breather after that!!

[atiguhya padma]

Kindly refrain from interrupting me while I sleep.

[atiguhya padma]

Looking carefully either side, he crossed the road and lay down in the filed of blazing corn.

[1960]

Losing sleep aint that bad. The world has gone mad, it was only a grape. Talk about overkill. So now the pilot is dead. The plane won't fly no more. And the vermin they called Ermine has wrapped itself round the neck of a Lord. And they say Jabberwocky is nonsense. BURP!!!

[atiguhya padma]

Meaning?

[1960]

N-n-n-nineteen and Napalmed. The corn was fresh he was toast - he was all crispy like a Sunday roast.

[atiguhya padma]

Oh I see, said the character that this story was all about.

[atiguhya padma]

Perhaps you could imagine me in some tangible location, with a decent expectation of something resembling a plot, and maybe another character to keep me company, so that I can exhibit your prodigious talents for dialogue, said the character to his creator.

[1960]

Queen Elizabeth smiled. 'How does one like my home?'

[amuse]

"Passing fair, my dear. Yes, quite acceptable."

***Oh, help, now I've forgotten the alphabet :D :D :D!!!

"Rather nice, m'dear. A fair, fair place indeed."

[1960]

"Stolen. Everything you see here was stolen." sneered the queen.

[Shea]

"Traditionally," she went on to explain, " stolen peices always make a place look more fair."

[atiguhya padma]

"Unless they're stolen from me, of course, in which case I would have to arrange for your decapitation and disembowelment" said the Virgin Queen, with the purest glee, at the thought of deconstituted bodies.

[amuse]

Violas played in perfect harmony with her macabre thoughts, and the walls of her palace trembled with anticipation.

[1960]

"Will you stop playing that infernal music, and can't we build my palace walls from sterner stuff?" raged the Virgin Queen

[avid_reader]

"X-Rays .. X-Rays .. they are what we need to use to find the cracks on the walls " said the queen
"Darling , X Rays are used to detect the cracks in our bones!" corrected the King jestingly.

[Blade]

Your a smart one king, mabey a little too smart, perhaps you'de like me to put a crack in your bones hmm

[avid_reader]

"what a joke .. ah ..what a joke .. You frail thing , putting a crack on my bones ? haha " . So saying , the king went out of the hall. The Queen was really angry now , bland music , shaky walls , jeering King ... her mind was really perturbed

[Shea]

<<<Umm... What happened to Z?>>>

[Shea]

"Zzz....zzz!!" the queen snored loudly as narcolepsy overtook her and dreams of cracking bones filled her head.

[amuse]

*

[amuse]

<<<OH help! SORRY Shea! my comp sometimes doesn't show the next thingy until i've posted and then gotta edit - mea culpa, knotty, knotty comp!!!>>>

[amuse]

Originally posted by Shea
"Zzz....zzz!!" the queen snored loudly as narcolepsy overtook her and dreams of cracking bones filled her head.

Around town she wandered, filling her basket with posies and fingernails, and a troupe of comedians entertained her by yo-yo-ing with their intestines.

[atiguhya padma]

"Bloody marvellous idea" thought the Crimson Queen as she pieced together the morsels of her next court entertainment

[atiguhya padma]

Cassivellaunus defending the Thames from Julius Caesar would make a good masque, she thought.

[Shea]

Dodging a bloody fist, she realized that Julius Caesar, gaping with wounds was coming after her to steal her crown.

[atiguhya padma]

"Enough of this daydream" she said to herself, "there's heads to roll, heretics to burn and spies to torture, and here am I wasting my valuable time on phantoms of the mind, when I should be signing death warrants, and ridding this sacred and beautiful land of blasphemous and heathen scum, (and thereby providing the poor urchins of London streets with some fine free entertainment)".

[Blade]

For the moment her mind was set, she would give the populace a show like they have never seen, hangings and marriges on the same platform! mass beheadings! and stonings of random villagers!

[atiguhya padma]

Grabbing the nearest Lord she could find, on a mere whim, she ordered the guards to confine him in the Tower, until the day of his death-giving.

[emily655321]

However, unfortunately for the Queen, the head of the guards was deeply in love with the Lord, and, with a cry of rage, drove her clean through with his sword.

[Sancho]

In my neck of the woods, "Queen" means something entirely different, piped in Billy-Bob-Roy-Gene.

[Shea]

Just then the Queen's ghost filled Billy-Bob-Roy-Gene's woods and a branch gave him a good "THWACK" and he went sprawling on his face.

[Sancho]

"Keniget," We are the Knights who say "Knict," said the slap-happy Billy-Bob-Roy-Gene.

[Shea]

Learing, the ghost Queen reluctantly ran off to find a shrubbery to appease the undefeatable knights who say "Knict".

[Sancho]

“May I be of assistance, madam,” said the newly chivalric and formerly homophobic Billy-Bob-Roy-Gene.

[emily655321]

"No!" she cried [that was an easy one :p], slapping him across the face with a herring, then proceeded to saw the fish to ribbons against a very large tree.

[atiguhya padma]

"Octopus tastes so much better than herring" she complained, "or at least the mariners tell me".

[Shea]

"Perhaps I can find an octopus to use this Billy person as bait to lure the crabs with for its dinner, thereby ending our crab plague." she devised.

[emily655321]

(Nobody's talking!! WTF. I'm gonna play some games, then. :D)

Quite suddenly, the waters of an adjacent bay began to churn and bubble with angry tentacles. Out crawled dozens upon dozens of giant octopi. With angry screeches they descended on the Queen. "No longer will we be pawns in your political games, dishonorable wench!" they cried.

Into a rush of tentacles then the Queen disappeared, her desperate screams mingling with the munching, squishing sounds of her devoured flesh. Then all sound ceased but for the contented burps and sighs of the sated cephalopods.

"It is the dawn of a new age, comrades," grimaced a small, gnarled, gangrene-colored octopus. "Without a leader the weak-mindedness of the human race will soon consume them and all will unravel into chaos. Eons of persecution and holocaust have ended, comrades! The invertebrates will rise again!"

The assembly squelched and groaned its enthusiastic agreement. The gnarled octopus slithered through the group to a large rock at the head of them, dragging one lame and mishapen tentacle behind him. Perching awkwardly on the rock, he leeringly surveyed his followers. Their watery eyes gleamed with excitement. All was going according to plan.

Just then the atmosphere was broken by a series of piercing shrieks. The octopus on the rock flashed a maddened glare into the deep woods whence it came. Out of the darkness shot a small bat, reeling in agony from a long tear in his right wing. The bat crashed to the ground at the foot of the rock, gasping for air.

"What the devil is going on," raged the interrupted octopus.

"Forgive me, my Lord," gasped the bat. "The Queen's destruction was spied upon...I followed them. In my haste I caught in their hair, they grabbed me, smashed me into a tree. I am dying."

"What's that to me? I have plenty of other spies. Which way did the offender run?"

"I didn't see, my Lord," whispered the choking bat. "To the North, I believe. Or the West."

"Useless worm!" sneered the octopus. With a slap of his heavy tentacle the suffering bat was crushed. The octopus seemed to ponder some angry thought for a moment. Then an idea occurred to him...

[ajoe]

So at which letter should the next person pick up..?

[subterranean]

*THREAD RESSURECTED*..Thank ye Shea ;)

...It wanted to kill him

[Shea]

Joyously, the octopus threw the crushed bat into the water sneering, "why not act like the flying fish, Batty!" But then...

[subterranean]

Kindly it said.."did i hurt you?"..and its face began to soft and he approached slowly to the bat..

:D :D

[Shea]

Looking at him with disbelief, the bat said, "What is this some kind of trick?"

[subterranean]

"My goodness, you're not that silly afterall..." And the octopus laughed so viciously as it began to approached closer with the meanest eyes one could ever imagine.

[Shea]

"Now to change!" the bat exclaimed and transformed to a vampire, but was rather confused as to where the octopus' neck was!

[Sancho]

Oh my gosh, quipped Billy-Bob-Roy-Gene, “all of them there critters is gonna make a nice jambalaya in my stew pot…Hmmm, I’m gonna need more Tabasco.”

[zanna]

Pepper was the only ingredient he still needed, so off he ran to South East Asia, where everyone knows it can be found in abundance.

[Danik 2016]

RESSURRECTING this funny story game

Questioning people here and there he finally arrived...

[Sancho]

"Rat Balls!" Stated Billy Bob Roy Gene. "Big fat hairy swinging Rat Balls!" He embellished. "Looks like I've been Shanghaied to some nonspecific South East Asian country." (BBRG had a knack for verbalizing back story, you see) "I don't know nobody here." He lamented.

[Danik 2016]

Sundry moments later, Juanito Moreno happened upon the plain. Being a foreigner he didn´t make much of BBRG verbalizations. But the guy seemed harmless. So JM took of his mighty sombrero with a sonore "Buenas!"

[Sancho]

"...tardes there amigo." Said Billy Bob in his best Lower-Alabama public-school Spanish. "¿Qué tal, Juanito? Mind if I call you Lil' John? The Langwich Spanguage ain't one of my strengths, yep, yep, yep, howdy, howdy."

[Danik 2016]

"Uno compreende, mate" said Juanito scratching his head thoughtfully."Lil´John is ok. Where are you bound to, anyway, BB?"

[Sancho]

"Vaya conmigo, Johnny-John." Declared Billy Bob. "And gird yer loins. Things is gittin' weird." Then he hitched up his jeans, let out whoop, and took off across the plain at a dead (if not somewhat bow legged) run.

[Danik 2016]

Well, said JJ, preparing to get on his horse again(never mind where the horse came from, on North American plains there have to be horsemen). Preparing to chase after BB, he suddently stopped halfway: "Caramba, what is this I see coming in our direction?"

[Sancho]

"Xiu!" ( 秀 ) Hailed Billy Bob (in his best Lower Alabama public-school Mandarin) to a strikingly beautiful lady racing across the plain at an oblique angle to Billy's own, and one which would subject them both to a bone jarring impact unless one or the other immediately altered course slightly or accelerated or decelerated just a smidge. "Xiu-ahhhhh!" ( 秀-ahhhh! ) Said Billy slightly altering his course and smidging down his speed a tad. "Sakes alive it's good to see you. What in tar nation is you doing out here on the plain?"

The woman broke into a broad smile and gestured behind Billy, "Who's the cat on the horse, William?"

"Xiu, you gotta meet him. That's Juanito. He goes by Johnny-John, JJ for short."

[Danik 2016]

"Your servant, my fair lady" greeted Juanito in his very best the-book-is-on-the- table English, floundering respecfully his expressive sombrero while he brought Gran Rocinante to a stand still. He luckily hadn,t overheard the "cat on the horse" part. "May this your humble servant ask where the lady is going to in all that hurry"?

[Sancho]

Zooming low over the plain, a huge condor distracted everybody's attention before Xiu could answer Juanito's question.

[Danik 2016]

All the three gaped condorwards, wondering perhaps what that majestic bird was during so far away from his native Andes. But just at that moment...

[Sancho]

...bam! That was the exact moment, as the other three were looking skywards, that the South American Condor decided to empty his G-I tract, beak to anus, creating a tremendous aerial bio-bomb.

[Danik 2016]

Crushed by the crappy storm:prrr::prrr::prrr::beatdeadhorse5: the four dived in the nearby sea (There wasn´t any sea bevor, but owning to necessity one had to be created.). It took them three days and three night´s fully to recover. Then they set fort to leave the inospitable plains for ever.:wave::wave::wave::wave: