kceoir
01-08-2007, 12:26 PM
Please let me know what you think this is my first post ever don't hold back.
15I noticed the rain coming through my slightly open window when a drop landed on my big toe. I was sitting on my chair. How long had I been here? My eyes searched lazily for the time and finally when I noticed the clock in the corner it takes a few seconds for them to focus. 4:34, already, I’m so confused, have I slept while I was lying here or was I just in a daze? I feel like everything’s so clear. After a moment of reflection I decide to get up. What a mistake, all of a sudden it felt like someone has taken a vice, put it on my temples and decided to squeeze it tighter the higherI rise from my chair. As I look around all I can see is filth and decay. I attempt to make my way through this cesspool of complete and utter trash, I Stumble once on an object I can hardly make out in the dim lighting. Then I put my foot into what I think is an ashtray full of soggy cigarette butts. Finally out of harm’s way I reach for the handle on the door. I stop and think to myself what’s going to be there on the other side. Usually I would not hesitate to open it but I’m in the condition when all of my normal logic is gone, my imagination goes into freak show mode. I don’t think of monsters and ghouls I think of people and light. Maybe in this state those things are my daemons maybe they will be on the other side when I open the door. My hand starts to shake as I grab the knob. All of a sudden my knee starts to quiver. Is that from the Drugs or is it from the fear? I take a deep breath and CLICK! That has to be one of the loudest noises in the world at 4:37 in the morning after snorting three quarters of an eight ball and still having the last quarter sitting on the table waiting to be in me. Half way out the door I realize there’s nothing that I need out there everything that I need is right in here. My cocaine and my solitude. I walk over to the table and rack up a huge line I use more than half of the coke I had left, I grab the bill roll it up and with one swift motion POOF I take it all in. As I take it in I feel the power building inside of me then it’s like a ball of acid hitting directly behind my right eye, for a moment it’s intolerable but then the intensity lessens. I start to like the way it feels dripping down the back of my nose. From out of nowhere some of it starts to hit my stomach in the wrong, way I automatically feel like I want to vomit and nothing’s going to stop me. I take a seat in my chair that I can barely feel anymore and force that vomiting feeling to go away. It works and I am finally relaxed here in my chair. I feel like the world is at peace and so am I.
See You In Fifteen Minutes.
15I noticed the rain coming through my slightly open window when a drop landed on my big toe. I was sitting on my chair. How long had I been here? My eyes searched lazily for the time and finally when I noticed the clock in the corner it takes a few seconds for them to focus. 4:34, already, I’m so confused, have I slept while I was lying here or was I just in a daze? I feel like everything’s so clear. After a moment of reflection I decide to get up. What a mistake, all of a sudden it felt like someone has taken a vice, put it on my temples and decided to squeeze it tighter the higherI rise from my chair. As I look around all I can see is filth and decay. I attempt to make my way through this cesspool of complete and utter trash, I Stumble once on an object I can hardly make out in the dim lighting. Then I put my foot into what I think is an ashtray full of soggy cigarette butts. Finally out of harm’s way I reach for the handle on the door. I stop and think to myself what’s going to be there on the other side. Usually I would not hesitate to open it but I’m in the condition when all of my normal logic is gone, my imagination goes into freak show mode. I don’t think of monsters and ghouls I think of people and light. Maybe in this state those things are my daemons maybe they will be on the other side when I open the door. My hand starts to shake as I grab the knob. All of a sudden my knee starts to quiver. Is that from the Drugs or is it from the fear? I take a deep breath and CLICK! That has to be one of the loudest noises in the world at 4:37 in the morning after snorting three quarters of an eight ball and still having the last quarter sitting on the table waiting to be in me. Half way out the door I realize there’s nothing that I need out there everything that I need is right in here. My cocaine and my solitude. I walk over to the table and rack up a huge line I use more than half of the coke I had left, I grab the bill roll it up and with one swift motion POOF I take it all in. As I take it in I feel the power building inside of me then it’s like a ball of acid hitting directly behind my right eye, for a moment it’s intolerable but then the intensity lessens. I start to like the way it feels dripping down the back of my nose. From out of nowhere some of it starts to hit my stomach in the wrong, way I automatically feel like I want to vomit and nothing’s going to stop me. I take a seat in my chair that I can barely feel anymore and force that vomiting feeling to go away. It works and I am finally relaxed here in my chair. I feel like the world is at peace and so am I.
See You In Fifteen Minutes.