failure what does it mean?!!

[sam96]

It happens to me sometimes that i go below expectations mine or other's.
what is supposed to happen in that moment let go of everything (coz that's what i want to do) although you know that you failed in something your good at?
OR just keep trying believing it will be better?!!
BUT what if it doesn't get better?!!
What happens when you realize that you r a commoner not unique not special u r just as everyone else is?

can someone plz help me and tell me how am i supposed to deal with it?

[B-Mental]

There is a quote that not getting back up after being knocked down is failure...I paraphrase I know. What is wrong with being common? If you don't want to be common, then only you can make yourself uncommon.

learn an instrument, conquer your fears, break out of your mold, explore your world and your self. If you do just one of those things with a passion you are not common. If you do all of those things with a passion, then you retain your individuality... It is all how you define success.

[sam96]

QUOTE=B-Mental
If you do all of those things with a passion, then you retain your individuality...

B-Mental:
do u honestly believe in that?
:p how do u define unique?

[AutumnGal]

Failure is the opportunity to learn from your mistake and make a future winning moment from your lesson. I learned a quote in my college business class, I can't remember who said it, but it was impactful just the same, I will paraphrase it, as well: Success is a string of small failures. This means to me that nobody does it perfectly the first time, but when we learn from those failures, incorporate the lessons learned, and re-attempt to accomplish our goals, we eventually achieve success.

For example, the Wright Brothers made numerous attempts at building a successful aircraft before their successful prototype came to be. If they had quit after their first failed attempt, then the fabled flight at Kitty Hawk never would have occurred. The Wright Brothers, btw, were considered "common" for their day, and certainly there wasn't anything that they'd accomplished to distinguish themselves until the Wright Flyer took off. I agree with B-Mental, "only you can make yourself uncommon."

The fact that you are questioning this concept indicates to me that you may possess the passion and fortitude to make the necessary changes in your life.

AG

[dramasnot6]

If we dont fail, how do we suceed?

[Virgil]

It happens to me sometimes that i go below expectations mine or other's.
what is supposed to happen in that moment let go of everything (coz that's what i want to do) although you know that you failed in something your good at?
OR just keep trying believing it will be better?!!
BUT what if it doesn't get better?!!
What happens when you realize that you r a commoner not unique not special u r just as everyone else is?

can someone plz help me and tell me how am i supposed to deal with it?

Oh, Sam, don't worry. We all fail. Setting your sights high is a good thing. You're young. Success will come. And you will also fail again too. Both happens in life. It does with me. At work I keep a framed quote from Theodore Roosevelt on my desk. This is it:

"It is not the critic who counts: not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes up short again and again, because there is no effort without error or shortcoming, but who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, who spends himself for a worthy cause; who, at the best, knows, in the end, the triumph of high achievement, and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who knew neither victory nor defeat."
To be in the arena and to dare great things is all one can strive for. Success or failure will happen as they happen. Just learn from your fialures.

[B-Mental]

QUOTE=B-Mental
If you do all of those things with a passion, then you retain your individuality...

B-Mental:
do u honestly believe in that?
:p how do u define unique?

you sound like its a load of crap... yes, I do believe that honestly. Its easy for you doubt me...that would make you common...in my honest opinion.

[sam96]

B-Mental:
i didn't mean that it's a load of crap it's just that when u read a book the answer to my question would b what u said.but then try falling and getting up again it's not such an easy thing you know but it is said that the hard road is the right road and don't b mad at me i'm sorry.:bawling: i wrote it right after i failed.

Dramasnot6:
i thought that maybe some people are not meant to succeed!!!!

Autumngal:
Thank you for your reply it boosted me ur actually stating it as a fact with examlpes :thumbs_up .

Virgil:
you know i didn't really think about it in a wide scale which i admit was very foolish of me (i mean i knew but i didn't fully comprehend it so it's not only me)lol
and a very good quote by the way.

[Stanislaw]

heh, failure = humanity.

it is human nature to fail, so, don't worry, your just another homosapien.

But for being common...what is the definition of common, how can it be defined. if you know yourself to be common, you are not. you have an awareness of different groups, which in its own respect makes you somewhat unique.

[sam96]

Stainslaw:
so u mean unique is being one's self? my definition of unique is somewhat not normal,unlike everybody else better or worse .
then another question if we classify people as really bad(few)
normal(most of them=commoners) and really good(also few).
Is being really bad better than being normal?

[dramasnot6]

in my opinion one suceeds if one creates happiness or good of any kind. If you are happy, family is made happy, you give to a charity and make those less fortunate then you happy...then you have suceeded.

[Bookworm Cris]

Hello Sam,

Your question brought so many good comments...

I once saw a definition of normal: "one who´s according to the norm"; it means that normal is just someone who´s behaving and thinking equally to the majority of people; it doesn´t mean he´s right or wrong. This is a different issue. And being really bad is WORSE than being normal, in my oppinion. But it´s better to be different, or even better, to be yourself.

Everybody´s unique; even if you fail like everybody, share the same tastes and opinions as the majority, believes in the same beliefs of many people, you´re still an unique person; your individuality is what makes you be yourself; there´s only one Sam96 in this world; only you thinks and feels exactly like you. And it´s good to be an unique individual.

As for failure, it´s normal; he who didn´t fail didn´t try; and he who didn´t try will not win. Like AutumnGal said:


"Failure is the opportunity to learn from your mistake and make a future winning moment from your lesson. I learned a quote in my college business class, I can't remember who said it, but it was impactful just the same, I will paraphrase it, as well: Success is a string of small failures. This means to me that nobody does it perfectly the first time, but when we learn from those failures, incorporate the lessons learned, and re-attempt to accomplish our goals, we eventually achieve success. "

That´s it. Don´t let your failures of today ruin your life. Learn with them, and think: I did my best, so, if I didn´t succeed, I´ll try again next time. Thinking this way allows you to put your head in the pillow every night and sleep peacefully with your conscience.

Chin up, and go ahead... ;)


And Virgil: I liked Teddy Roosevelt quote too... very good one.

[dramasnot6]

Stainslaw:
so u mean unique is being one's self? my definition of unique is somewhat not normal,unlike everybody else better or worse .
then another question if we classify people as really bad(few)
normal(most of them=commoners) and really good(also few).
Is being really bad better than being normal?

I dont believe in the term "normal". No one is born normal, they merely choose to conform in later life. Everyone is born differently, and it is there choice to live and to be different or not. The major powers in society, the media, politics, set standards based on what they want and their beliefs to how everyone should live and be. Many people choose to conform to the standards and deem themselves "normal", but its completely up to you sam. You are born with the ability to suceed just as much as anyone else, in different ways yes, but still to suceed. We get the idea from societal standards that "suceeding" is a very limited and specific act, like making lots of money or getting lots of power. But its not like that, success is completely molded by who suceeds. My mom has always told me when i have asked about sucess "Its not what you have, but what you do with it". Its a good philosophy to live by. Ill paste a few quotes i agree with about sucess, maybe they will help:

"If you find it in your heart to care for somebody else, you will have succeeded."
-Maya Angelou


"A successful person is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks that others throw at him."
-David Brink

Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.
-Sir Winston Churchill

"Try not to become a man of success, but rather try to become a man of value." -Albert Einstein

[sam96]

Hey Cris:
Thanx you help me and push me up yayyyy!
i'll try not to get beaten down again more importantly i'll always try to get up.

Dramasnot6:
Then we (usually)always have the same potential but it's a matter of we do with it .you know ur right the media does have a role in this(in general i mean)
and thank you for the quotes they really were helpful.

[Poetess]

What happens when you realize that you r a commoner not unique not special u r just as everyone else is?

can someone plz help me and tell me how am i supposed to deal with it?

My dear, everyone is special in a way or another. We might have alot of commons, but we`ll certainly have something that differentiates us.


Failure, to me, is, "You did it wrong, RE-DO it again until you do it correctly."

I forgot his name, but when his lab was burning he called his son asking him to call his mother and see how the lab was burning, for she WONT see it burning again. That means he lost alot of projects, important projects, but he didn`t give up, he decided to make-it-up and hopefully this thing wont happen again.
We learn from out mistakes and failures.

Just give it MORE importance/attention, set the goal, and achieve it.

[sam96]

Poetess:
you fail??
fine,i'll re-do it but i am 15 years how many times CAN i re-do.
P.S:
i'm glad you decided to post here (i kinda hoped that you would).

[IamMissingaLink]

Failure is to give up when your luck is down.

[Pendragon]

It is not failure to trip and fall. Failure is to lie there whining about it. Edison when trying to find the best filament for a light bulb had a great number of them not work. He did not call them "failures", when laughed at concerning them, he said he had discovered many ways not to make a light bulb! Abraham Lincoln is one of America's most beloved Presidents. What many do not know is that he had lost several elections to congress and the VP race the term before he won the Presidency. Perseverance is the answer! ;)

[Bookworm Cris]

That´s it, Pen! You put it right.

[Poetess]

Poetess:
you fail??
fine,i'll re-do it but i am 15 years how many times CAN i re-do.
P.S:
i'm glad you decided to post here (i kinda hoped that you would).

I am a human, I certainly fail. What bothers the most is failing when you already know it`s going to be wrong. I mean when you are defeatist about something, got me? like you know it`s going to be wrong and you adapt the truth of it!

SAM you are 15, you still have alot to do! Keep on seizing the moments if it`s something worthy, if it really deserves.
If you believe what you`re behind is benefitial then never stop a re-try!

I wish I go back to my age of 15, I would have done alot of things in the right way (I wanted to say "perfectly", but umm you know, nothing is ever perfect)


It IS my pleasure to post :D
kisses

[Nightshade]

I dont belive in failure. Or is I dont belive in losing?
Becacuse even if you dont suceed in achivening wanty you wanted you always learn somthing so you always gain somthing so you cant ever fail.

well unless you dont try for anything but then you cant suceed either so you cant fail.

[Yelena]

Quote=B-mental
Our failures help us succeed faster. I believe it is a failure to give up, even after a defeat. If you don't try to achieve it yourself, nobody's going to do it for you. So to me, to fail = to give up.

[sam96]

Nightshade:
I don't mean that failure is a matter of losing experiences coz it's not.But i meant it as losing time,energy,self-esteem...etc.
and if u think about it that way then failing is a loss if it's experience wasn't enough to compensate fot the efforts exerted in it.

[Yelena]

Hm....I'm thinking.... even bad experience can actually be good experience. There's a good quote :"Sometimes a negative can be positive and a positive can be an opportunity".
Even though we wish it (=bad experience) didnt happen to us, we still learn a lot from it. So, maybe bad experience isnt merely losing time, energy and hurting one's self-esteem...?

[Poetess]

"Sometimes a negative can be positive and a positive can be an opportunity".

Negative = positive = opportunity (i`m not talking generally, sometimes and in this case which is failure)

==>negative = a new opportunity.
yes, this is what the majority of us said.

[Bii]

Failure is a strange concept and I think only occurs when you let it overtake you and give up. Often people see failure as something which happens when you find you can't do something, particularly when it is something you desire to achieve, for example, passing an exam, winning a race, passing your driving test to use simplistic examples. However, sometimes your greatest achievement can be to accept that you won't achieve that thing, realise it isn't the end of the world, move on and try something else. Sometimes, that can make you happier.

Time and perspective can make you view 'failure' very differently. To give you a personal example, I dropped out of university when I was 18 after a very short period of time. At that point everything I had been doing had been working me up to that place in university. But the summer before I was due to go, I changed, I grew up, my needs/wants/desires changed. So I dropped out and at the time I felt like the biggest failure. I thought I should have had more resilience, I should have given it more time. I didn't know what I would do with myself, university had been my only goal for so long. My parents were furious (as you'd expect). Now, many years on I look back at that as being one of the best things I ever did, and a pivotal moment in my life. It was the first grown up decision I made and it marks the point, for me, when I became a responsible adult. If someone asked me if I could undo what I did then, and save myself the pain and the anguish I experienced at the time I wouldn't even consider it. I can't say it would make me happier.

So my message for you is, sometimes what you see as failure is just success in disguise!!

And as for the question of being 'common', I must credit the lovely people at Despair Inc for the next quote:

"Individuality - always remember that you are unique, just like everybody else"

Individuality is something we share.

[sam96]

Bii:
Those simplistic examples (and others like it) r the ones that get me down.
And u r probably right (or else there wouldn't b anything to get me up from bed).
Thanx Bii.

[Stanislaw]

Stainslaw:
so u mean unique is being one's self? my definition of unique is somewhat not normal,unlike everybody else better or worse .
then another question if we classify people as really bad(few)
normal(most of them=commoners) and really good(also few).
Is being really bad better than being normal?

not really...being unique is understanding that there are norms, and understanding whcih category you fall into.

[Bii]

Those simplistic examples (and others like it) r the ones that get me down.

I appreciate it might not feel like it now, but believe me, one day, when you're in your 30's, you'll look back and think 'what was I worried about?'

Hope it all works out.

[Poetess]

Failure + Patience = success.. Sam =)

[Nightshade]

Nightshade:
I don't mean that failure is a matter of losing experiences coz it's not.But i meant it as losing time,energy,self-esteem...etc.
and if u think about it that way then failing is a loss if it's experience wasn't enough to compensate fot the efforts exerted in it.

but thats my point its never lost becaus eyou always learn somthing you might not get what you thought you wanted but you always get somthing and so far in my life at least its always been what I really wanted/needed even if I didnt know it to start off with :nod:

[Scheherazade]

And sometimes failure means just that... That we were not able to achieve something and end of the story.

[sam96]

Nightshade:
So it's really same as Bii point failure can b success in disguise.
Scheherazade:
Then y do we have the ability to think that big in the first place.So it would b like here's what u can't have,What u can never b,Who you'ld never b.
I don't know if i'ld want to believe that,do u?

[blp]

'Try, fail. Try again, fail better.' - Samuel Beckett.

You sound like you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself to succeed. That pressure in itself can cause you to fail. If you do things for the interest of doing them rather than for a desired result, you'll probably enjoy them more and do a better job.

[Countess]

Sam,

In my mind (now) I am failure, so I understand how you feel.

For me failure is examining my success in the past, the expectations I have for my subsequent future and the fact that right now I consistently never deliver on that promised future.

But I am half-suicidal so don't listen to me.

[jgx]

It does not seem possible, to me, to fail unless there is some idea, concept, of success. Now the idea may be totally un-realistic like me learning to leap off tall buildings and fly but there can be no fail...no "I did not" unless there is some idea of "what I wanted to do".

Me, I feel like a major failure in life and at 42 this becomes a bigger and bigger...well...crisis.

I suppose that my sense of having failed comes from alot of places...social ideas of what is success...how I was raised in terms of expectations that were forced on me.

But now, as an adult, the only real failure that concerns me is love. My expectation was that I would love other people deeply. I do not feel like I have done that or if I have done so at times I have not done so nearly as much as I could have. And so I feel like a failure because my sense of what I could do is not what I have so far done.

It has helped me to remember that the self-talk "I am a failure" is not only a harmful message to keep on have going on...but in terms of logic it is wrong.

The truth is I "feel" like a failure. It is an emotion and it is a feeling about myself that I have not always had and even when I have felt it it has varied in intensity.

I guess the point is that I am not my failures. My failures are how I "feel" about actions I have done or not done. But it is a feeling not a fact. And since I truly believe that I am just as deeply good and whole now as I was when born then there is nothing I can "do" that makes me into "a failure". My soul is intact and I supppose the best way to move forward is to keep on remembering who I actually am as opposed to the lies and myths and shame and blame that has distorted my sense of myself.

;)

[Pendragon]

Sam,

In my mind (now) I am failure, so I understand how you feel.

For me failure is examining my success in the past, the expectations I have for my subsequent future and the fact that right now I consistently never deliver on that promised future.

But I am half-suicidal so don't listen to me. And that is why someone SHOULD take the time to listen to you. As long as you have not fully gone into hopelessness there is still hope. Don't take a permanent solution for what may very well be a temporary problem. I've been there. PM me, I will talk to you anytime. It hurts when you feel no one cares. There are people who do. I bear scars myself. I'd be glad to help in anyway I can. Buck up, Countess! Someone does care. :)

[Whifflingpin]

I have heard it said that, in this respect, we may divide our lives into work, relationships and hobbies. We need to be successful in one of these areas in order to feel worthwhile - the corollary is that we only need to feel successful in one of these.

I expect most of us have known times when we have felt that we are failures in all three.

Unless there is a clinical reason for the feeling of failure (possibly, especially in adolescence, something as simple and easy to remedy as low blood sugar or lack of sleep*) then concentrating on just one area is a way to start getting out of the cycle of failure. Once one area is satisfactory the others are more likely to improve, but, even if not, one area of success is enough.

*Students moving away from home can simply forget to look after themselves. Two useful bits of advice are - remember to eat, and make sure that each night you get some sleep, even if you just go to bed at dawn and get up for breakfast.

.

[Eagleheart]

Failure is only the cryptic language of one's life, communicating with one...Either one has utilized inappropriate methods in the execution of one's intentions or has to question the intentions themselves, to redefine success...The chimeric basis for success is debunked in failure sometimes, and failure redirects one to the beginning of the undertaking itself...Sometimes it inexorably questions the "successful", the dogmatic "successfulness"...

[il-janus]

This thread reminds of a particular well-known fantasy, "The Lord of the Rings." In it we see Frodo who had only one goal, to go to mount doom. That was the beggining and the end of the story. The most striking thing was to achieve his goal. He did not know how he is going to do it, everything came by itself. Along the way he failed many times, was going to get killed, but perseverance and strength of character brought him to the end.

I do really understand Sam, because I like many others have the same problem. When we're young we dream wild dreams, and everything seems attainable. Yet when we grow up we realize that not everything is attainable, we have to fight to get what we want. We have to do like Frodo, face the perils, dangers, enemies, and most of all FAILURE.

The most important thing is to have a goal, a target, an aim. If you don't have this you already failed before you kicked off. Set your goals and the path will be drawn, and the most important pencil would be your failures. Overcome them, and you're a happy man.

[sam96]

Blp:
you r totally right it did force me to fail but pressure is the only way i know (there was this math problem i like math i solved t at home and couldn't solve it in the test the exact same problem).

Countess:
Not just my expectations other's as well.
And there r times when i am half-suicidal too.(i think it's natural):p

Jgx:
It doesn't seem like u have failed to me.i mean u replied to my post even if it's just writing it is nice.Don't think u r a failure in love(says someone who never liked a guy for more than 2 or 3 days!) mayb u r just concentrating on 1 thing so u r not seeing other things.

Whifflingpin:
Well i'm successful in one thing or maybe 2.That's enough?

il-janus:
The problem is that my dream is attainable.but i'm working for it while knowing that it's gonna b a very long shot to get it.

Eagleheart:
so u mean..............

[summer grace]

I often can do math at home, and then not on the test as well. I think it is because I had no confidence in myself. Are you struggling with school, perhaps? I spent the last semester struggling with math and science thinking I was going to flunk both, and that I was a failure. But, I passed both, even though I got a D in science, which isn't the best. ( I'm in college). I was really depressed as well, this autumn about it. But, I was lucky enough to meet someone who pulled me out of it, and also pulled me out of too many years of despair, and has made me really happy. I met them just when I was really struggling.

As for failure, I think too often we call ourselves failures if we are not the world's definition of success. But that is foolish, because we all make success for ourselves in our minds, and if we chose to define ourselves by other people's standards, then we will never be a success in our own minds. That is true no matter how we meet other's standards. Failure is something that we define for ourselves, but when immense pressure is put on us by those about us, we only think of pleasing them. But, success is to be happy, it is not to love the most, have a great job, have a great family, make lots of money, or even do well in school, because often people have more practical/ different forms of intelligence.

There are so many standards we have to meet these days, but we can always find someone who doesn't judge us if we look hard enough. I think often that is the issue, that we are afraid of being looked down upon if we don't succeed in something. The truth is, who cares? Just don't pay attention to your naysayers, or to negative people, and do your best. Most people succeed in the end, although I am very afraid of the future, and of what will be my success in the end, still at times. I like the quote '' We come to do what we are doing by not being able to do something''- Grace Paley. That's a paraphrase, but when I read that I thought exactly, how many figures in history or in the arts have found that to be true? Many. But, that's hard to see when everything around you is going from bad to worse, and your family puts pressure on you, etc.

So many times I have been in tears about things that a few years down the road, I realize made me a wiser, better, and deeper person, if not always a happy one. But happiness comes. Another thing about failure is , don't worry about it. It just makes things much worse, and worry by itself is bad, without stress and failure added in. A good song about success and failure, is the Duran Duran song '' What happens tomorrow''- it is about how you might be afraid of the future, but that it will be alright in the end. You might not know what happens tomorrow, but maybe that is to your advantage. You can't predict success or failure, or know which of each will happen tomorrow. Hope that helps.

[sam96]

Summer grace:
Of course it helps.
i have a regular b+ in science and in mah i shift between a+ and a- .
But the problem is that i know i could b better and its taking a long time.

[summer grace]

Yeah I know. I am back in math and it isn't going well. But, you have to believe it will be okay, I guess. So I guess I am back speculating what failure means.

[sam96]

Summergrace:
Dont' worry.Just work fot it i'm sure u can make it go well.
Good luck.:p

[heaven!]

read this quote long ago i don't even remember who said..."worrying is like a rocking chair.gives you something to do but gets you no where." paraphrasing,ofcourse. just do what you do.if you are happy with it,failure shouldn't even feature in your vacabulary.
am a first timer here by the way

[sam96]

heaven!:
I know i'm not supposed to worry but i can't help it.
And when something u like doing starts to interfere with the way ur future goes(as studying) it stops making u happy.I never knew y but it always happens.
P.S:
Welcome,Hope u like it here :)

[crazybrat]

Hey ..i suddenly remember a meaningful sentence
" Failure is God's way of saying,'Excuse me ,you're moving in a wrong direction.' "
i couldn't remember who said it anyway it teaches me a lot and encourge me
to face failure and not to turn away from it . You know there are lots of
directions ,we just don't need to go straight all the time ,we can turn left or right. Sometimes we do have to go back and try another direction and next time we will have learnt how to choose a suitable direction to continue our life journey.

Be brave and face your failures and correct your mistakes. The more you face the tougher you are .

[miss tenderness]

And sometimes failure means just that... That we were not able to achieve something and end of the story.


Is n't ? I mean what does failure give us but discouragement ,bitterness and low self-esteem. I've always tried to adjust to the saying that Failure is Your Way to Success! How come?
I mean when I fail in an area , I run away from it trying to find my success in another. I just can't see how failure is my way to success.
If you fail , everybody does! Don't worry about that,try to discover a bit more about yourself , the things that you are good at, make use of them , this way you'll find your way to success. Hope everything is better now with you Sam and Countess.

[Neo_Sephiroth]

read this quote long ago i don't even remember who said..."worrying is like a rocking chair.gives you something to do but gets you no where." paraphrasing,ofcourse. just do what you do.if you are happy with it,failure shouldn't even feature in your vacabulary.
am a first timer here by the way

I'm somewhat late but...Welcome to Lit-Net! Enjoy your stay!:D


heaven!:
I know i'm not supposed to worry but i can't help it.
And when something u like doing starts to interfere with the way ur future goes(as studying) it stops making u happy.I never knew y but it always happens.
P.S:
Welcome,Hope u like it here :)

Whoa! Whoa! Hold up there Sammy-boy! When something you like starts to interfere with the way your future goes? I think you'll have to elaborate on your situation there a little.

If you don't want to then I'll just address the part of you worrying but can't help but worry. Umm...Well...If you know you're not suppose to worry but still do...Then...I can't think of anything else to say.:D


Is n't ? I mean what does failure give us but discouragement ,bitterness and low self-esteem. I've always tried to adjust to the saying that Failure is Your Way to Success! How come?
I mean when I fail in an area , I run away from it trying to find my success in another. I just can't see how failure is my way to success.
If you fail , everybody does! Don't worry about that,try to discover a bit more about yourself , the things that you are good at, make use of them , this way you'll find your way to success. Hope everything is better now with you Sam and Countess.


http://i45.photobucket.com/albums/f100/garnet1975/Smilies/character00176.gifYo! Hold your horses little-Miss Tenderness! You put out some mighty-fine advices there darling! However, I do believe I have to address on something you've said there.

You question the statement "Failure is Your Way to Success!" Now, I'm surprise about that little lady. Since you gave some might-fine advices in your post. Yet, you overlooked your own advices and the connection it has with the aforementioned statement.

You see, you mentioned that if you fail, don't worry about it, 'cause everybody fails. Am I right? Yes, yes.

You also said that if you fail in one thing, find something else that you might be good at, have an interest in, and learn about it. Not to mention to learn more about yourself as well, eh? Yes, yes.

Well, can't you see? All that you've mention is "Failure is Your Way to Success!"

For when you know that you've fail one thing BUT still continue to move on to other things to pursue...You end up in success!

Therefore, "Failure is Your Way to Success!"http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y32/djf101803/Smilies/woohoo.gif

[blp]

Homer Simpson (after failure on Bart's part): Now let this be a lesson, son. If something's difficult to do, it's probably not worth doing at all. Now...let's go watch TV.

Bart: What's on?

Homer: It doesn't matter.

[sam96]

I don't know what's worse failing or taking advice from homer. lol:)

[sam96]

Neo:
I can't really help it.It's like knowing that u have to concentrate but still can't.
It's a problem i know but it's a part of me i am too stressed i'm too nervous.

[sam96]

Miss Tenderness:
I understand that u may not b good at 1 thing and be good at another.
But no matter what is said it's still bitter to fail.
And a lot of things r better now thanx.:)

[miss tenderness]

You see, you mentioned that if you fail, don't worry about it, 'cause everybody fails. Am I right? Yes, yes.

You also said that if you fail in one thing, find something else that you might be good at, have an interest in, and learn about it. Not to mention to learn more about yourself as well, eh? Yes, yes.

Well, can't you see? All that you've mention is "Failure is Your Way to Success!"

For when you know that you've fail one thing BUT still continue to move on to other things to pursue...You end up in success!

Therefore, "Failure is Your Way to Success!"http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y32/djf101803/Smilies/woohoo.gif

get what you're saying ,Neo, and tottally agree.

what I wanted to say is that if you fail in sth , do not persisit on it! find yourself somewhere els.

[andave_ya]

Well, I'm not sure I agree with what seems to be the general consensus here. Unless I'm mistaken, it seems like you're suggesting that if you aren't good at one thing, go on to another that you do enjoy. Sometimes you can't do that. Take me, for example. I'm doing Algebra II right now in school. I can't say I'm actually smart, but I prefer to think of myself as studious. I like to study. But I am a literature person, not an algebra person. Algebra for me is majorly hard! It took me the entire school year and all summer and partway into this year to finish Algebra 1 because I struggled so much through it. I cried, I sweated, I felt like ripping it into pieces but I didn't, because a hundred people would have been down my throat. Now, I'm doing better! So, my opinion is,

"Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again!"
(That's from a black and white movie called Swing Time) :)

Keep hacking away at whatever it is and eventually it'll disappear!

[Matsiah]

I hate failure... I had my nose broke from a head-butt and had the right side of my head slammed against the concrete repeatedly in a recent failure. It was disappointing, but I stood up and held myself high for attempting honestly, against a contender who's weight exceeded my own twofold, and was a high school wrestling champion. When considering the circumstances, I feel I did my best.

[Tenacious]

I kinda think failure is man made concept and draw back evolving from past history when human kind turned away from god. Now a days people look at their lives, consider them to be a failure and shove a shot gun down their throat while jerking on the trigger. Failure can be remedied with a little faith and repentance for past wrongs... all depends on the person i suppose.

[sam96]

Andave ya:
I'm doing Algebra 1.I like it but then i always liked math in general.So u say perseverance is the thing to do.

Matsiah:
No one likes failure.But i think if u take some time after u might c a bright side.
I hope u r ok?(stupid question?!!)

Tenacious:
It depends on how u look at it.

[Neo_Sephiroth]

Well, I'm not sure I agree with what seems to be the general consensus here. Unless I'm mistaken, it seems like you're suggesting that if you aren't good at one thing, go on to another that you do enjoy. Sometimes you can't do that. Take me, for example. I'm doing Algebra II right now in school. I can't say I'm actually smart, but I prefer to think of myself as studious. I like to study. But I am a literature person, not an algebra person. Algebra for me is majorly hard! It took me the entire school year and all summer and partway into this year to finish Algebra 1 because I struggled so much through it. I cried, I sweated, I felt like ripping it into pieces but I didn't, because a hundred people would have been down my throat. Now, I'm doing better! So, my opinion is,

"Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again!"
(That's from a black and white movie called Swing Time) :)

Keep hacking away at whatever it is and eventually it'll disappear!

Uh, uh, uh...You only "...pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again..." only if you REALLY want to. By "REALLY", I mean if you want it that badly.

If not you then "...pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start on something else..."

Yes, yes...Preserverance can pay off. But there is such a thing as a "lost cause", you know?

As for your math problems...Well...It's not like you gonna major in that area, right? So you work your butt off to get through it...But I bet you wouldn't wanna go through that again, right?

[summer grace]

I hate math in general. I am also taking a course in math, and believe me, it is an uphill struggle, but I have to do it. I hate the word problems though, just hate them. I don't think society should make people study useless things that are never going to do them any good, and they are just going to forget anyway, and then define success or failure by it. But, believe me, it does, and you must do it, and so I plow on, counting the months until I am done with this math, and I can truly say I am not a failure.

[manolia]

It happens to me sometimes that i go below expectations mine or other's.
what is supposed to happen in that moment let go of everything (coz that's what i want to do) although you know that you failed in something your good at?
OR just keep trying believing it will be better?!!
BUT what if it doesn't get better?!!
What happens when you realize that you r a commoner not unique not special u r just as everyone else is?

can someone plz help me and tell me how am i supposed to deal with it?


Untill now i have never understood what is success. Is it the acquisition of great amounts of money? No. Many brilliant artists and authors heve died destitute. Is it a matter of fame? Wrong again (you can be really famous but mediocre). Is it success in your field of work? Then again not all fields of work provide opportunities for innovations. That is just a thought.

In my opinion, most peolple do not really know in what they are good at. And some of them never find out (so much talent lost. You see, i believe that all people are good at something). So it's important to explore or rather realise your own faculties. But beware. You may think that you are good at something and you may be wrong and viceversa.

Well this may sound like a cliche to you but you must never give up. You must continue your efforts and you WILL get better at whatever it is that you do. When i was a university student (not so long ago) in my field of study (which is considered a dificult one) and now in my field of work i have seen some not so promising individuals thrive. And that can be only achieved with hard work and perseverance (now, you do sound promising you know!). Never let a failure (and sometimes more than one) detain you. Even the greatest scientists sometimes failed (and some others stumbled upon the truth by accident).

I do not understand the phrase "up to the expectations of others". You should set your own standards. But be carefull. Do not be over-exigent with yourself. Remember that what defines humanity is the act of making mistakes.

And last (but not least) What's wrong with being common?? Some of the most interesting people i've met were wonderfully common.

[dramasnot6]

I absolutely agree Summer grace. I have always been frustrated at and despised math, but work hard at it nonetheless because I know how important it is to get into University with decent math skills. I always believed math was neccesary for your average person with a non-mathematical proffesion, but to a much lesser extent then we are forced to learn in most places. Probably just 9th grade math is all we REALLY need up to.

[summer grace]

Yeah, you are right about math. Some math is very practical, and we need that. It's when I get into algebra stuff that I just sigh. I think it is easier to be a failure or feel like a failure in the area of math rather than anything else, if you are not good at it.

I think fear of failure causes you intense anxiety that you really can only forget by going to sleep. I am so afraid of failure, because I feel like it reflects on me. I think that is natural, but how much does it reflect on you? I am so afraid of failure right now, it haunts me all day and night.

It did last fall as well, but it ended up not happening, but how is that any assurance that it might not happen this time? That's how I think all day, besides OF math which makes me afraid of failure. I'm just confused about the real meaning of failure and how much fear of failure might actually make you fail. Or is it better not to be afraid?

[kilted exile]

Yes, the average person doesnt need to know a great deal of maths - just basic arithmetic. However it is useful to continue teaching math because it relates to logic and thinking. If it is too confusing just consider it as another language.

[sam96]

Hey,What's wrong with math,i love math(teachers' pet speaking :)).But i agree it is too much sometimes but it's an easy subject to get grades in so it's better than some other subjects.

Manolia:
That's really nice "explore your own faculties".I try to convince myself that i'm bad at everything(even in the things that i'm good at) to force myself to exert more efforts(sounds wierd i know).
So,When i do fail i feel like it's a disaster.
By the way what was your studying field?(I do sound promising?!! :lol: )
I know i should make my own expectations but i don't like when someone is disappointed in me.

[byquist]

Just find one item you can hold on to and don't make it too vast. As in "What About Bob?" -- babysteps. Babystepping.

Or Polonious to Laertes: "To thine own self be true and, as it follows the night the day, thou cans't not be false to any man." -- may not be exact. Thus, try to be truthful to life, but not selfish.

Also, not to put yourself down, which accomplishes nothing. One leader said: "Treat yourself like a dog," partly in humor, but meaning that: Most of us treat dogs nice. Yes, we discipline 'em, but mostly we compliment them. So, treat yourself suchwise. Treat yourself like a dog.

[manolia]

To Sam96:

Your method is a cruel one. Why on earth should you convince yourself that you are bad at everything?? There are other ways to exert yourself. You asked about my profession. I am a Civil Engineer. You say that "you know you should make your own expectations but you don't like when someone is disappointed in you". Well..even if you were perfect in everything there will be always someone who will be unsatisfied (people tend to behave that way).So what are you going to do about that? What i mean is that in your life you should value only the opinion of people who are worth it. I am sure you already know who these people are.

[sam96]

Manolia:
Well,I know it's somewhat an eccentric method but it pushes me forward(most of the time :)).
I was talking about these people(and they r a lot!!).When i do something good they expect me to be good all the time and i expect me to be good all the time.

[andave_ya]

Sam:
It's good that you expect yourself to be good all the time. You should. But you can't be. I can't be either, and that is one thing I have had to struggle in learning. but there is a difference between being good at something and just working through it. Either one is open to you, it's just up to you whether to like it or not. (I've decided that I am in no wise going to like math, no matter how good I get at it. If I get good at it.) :bawling:


Yes, yes...Preserverance can pay off. But there is such a thing as a "lost cause", you know

There is, Neo, but rarely. You can do anything you set your mind to. The sky's the limit!

[Neo_Sephiroth]

Sam:
It's good that you expect yourself to be good all the time. You should. But you can't be. I can't be either, and that is one thing I have had to struggle in learning. but there is a difference between being good at something and just working through it. Either one is open to you, it's just up to you whether to like it or not. (I've decided that I am in no wise going to like math, no matter how good I get at it. If I get good at it.) :bawling:



There is, Neo, but rarely. You can do anything you set your mind to. The sky's the limit!

Well, well...Aren't we a high-spirited, optimistic one, eh?:p

A lost cause is..."Rare", you say?

*Sigh*

It seems that there ain't nothing I can say and/or do to change your mind, is there?

Eh...I wouldn't want to anyway. I like your high-spirited and optimistic energy!:D Even I'm starting to be affected by it!

Woohoo!!! The sky's the limit!!! I'm gonna set my mind to fly!!! I know I can fly!!! Woohoo!!!

*Neo runs, jumps off a cliff, and flaps his arms*

Woohoo!!! I'm can fly!!! I can-Huh!? Uh-Oh...

*Falls flat on the ground*

Ugh...I...Believe...I...Can...Fly...I...Believe... I...Can...Touch...The...Sky...

Hehe...Just kidding!:p But I still like your high-spirited and optimistic energy! Keep that spirit!!!:D

[andave_ya]

Sorry -- maybe I am a little annoying at times. It's just that I honestly feel life is good! And, I just noticed, you're in Stockton! I'm in Hayward, an hour from SF.

[Neo_Sephiroth]

Sorry -- maybe I am a little annoying at times. It's just that I honestly feel life is good! And, I just noticed, you're in Stockton! I'm in Hayward, an hour from SF.

Nah...What are you apologizing for? Apologizing for feeling that life is good? Nonsense!

Umm...But that can be a little annoying at times...I mean, to some people. Not me, of course!:D

When you say "SF", are you talking about San Francisco? Hmm...But I'm in Stockton.

[andave_ya]

Thanks for the input! I'll keep it in mind. :D

and yup, an hour from San Francisco. Do you ever come down here?

[Neo_Sephiroth]

Thanks for the input! I'll keep it in mind. :D

and yup, an hour from San Francisco. Do you ever come down here?

Unfortunately...No.:( I've never been down to San Francisco. Have you ever came up to Stockton?

[andave_ya]

oh yes. many times.

Neo, after my last post, I remembered this verse in the Bible that might show what kind of beliefs I have.


"For I am persuaded that neither death, nor life, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:38-39

With that kind of background, I rest assured that my life after death will be safe and happy, so life right now is good too.

And I just realized that between you and I we totally veered this thread off course. If you want to keep talking, private message me? I'll answer, if you want to keep going.

[Neo_Sephiroth]

oh yes. many times.

Neo, after my last post, I remembered this verse in the Bible that might show what kind of beliefs I have.



With that kind of background, I rest assured that my life after death will be safe and happy, so life right now is good too.

And I just realized that between you and I we totally veered this thread off course. If you want to keep talking, private message me? I'll answer, if you want to keep going.

Oh, crap! Umm...Sorry 'bout this folks...:p

Umm...Lets get back to the subject at hand: Failure! What does it mean!?:D

[littlewing53]

failure....refusal to breathe new life

[sam96]

It's fine Neo.Really,It's good i'm getting to know u both.


Littlewing53:
Define new life.

[littlewing53]

hi sam.new life.in a few words.that i can start anew every morning