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Dry_Snail
11-28-2006, 02:38 AM
The Crow

It was a dull afternoon, when Jim couldn’t resist farting. All his classmates, irritated, agitated, incited, excited, and delighted ones, tore him to shreds with their piercing invisible beaks. Jim gathered all the strewn shreds of his being and shrunk inside himself. This usually helped him. It was a shell, a shield that protected him from the inevitable hatred. Jim looked as pathetic as Mr. Lohia’s crutches looked, standing lonely in the corner of the class. Mr. Lohia, a poliomyelitis patient, had his left leg crumpled like a rinsed towel long ago. He used to teach Geography.

The cawing kids around Jim didn’t stop teasing him, until they woke Mr. Lohia up from his noon siesta. Mr. Lohia, being honest to his reputation, went berserk like a chicken with a chopped head and stopped abruptly after flogging half of the class. The class drowned in to a dead silence. “What the hell was happening here?”, Mr. Lohia screamed in his high pitch voice through the dense silence. It steered like a crack in a frozen pane of a dark river. “Jim farts in the classroom Sir!” someone croaked in disgust. This caught Mr. Lohia off guard. After an awkward silence the whole class burst out laughing including Mr. Lohia. Jim’s predicament was yet to be over. Mr. Lohia scrutinized Jim as if he is one of those formalin-preserved worms, in zoology lab. And before he could understand what exactly was happening, Jim was squirming with pain. Mr. Lohia stopped flogging Jim lest he would pee in his pants as he did last time. “Why do you eat so much you filthy creep? Stop eating for ten days from now on or I will beat the **** out of you.” Jim heard the warning passively, looked at the mocking class and smiled weakly at Alisha, the blue eyed fairy, before sitting down. The class regained its content but suppressed hubbub. Mr. Lohia started snoring again.

The afternoon looked like a prisoner through the rusty iron grilled windows. The autumn was shredding through each and every green tree surrounding the school, sucking the chlorophyll from all the greenery and transmuting it to a dull shade of yellow ochre. Jim was sitting alone without any bench-mate, watching the defoliated acacia tree and its inhabitant, an old crow, in the barren playground. The tree sprouted from a concrete fence of an old well. It was only the roots of the acacia, which retained the well’s dignity by holding the concrete together, or the well could have been nothing more than a deep gutter. Still the well had an enigma. The randomly chirping unknown bird got distracted and fluttered somewhere.

The bell rang four tolls and the sound waves transmogrified the suppressed hubbub in to a sudden chaos. Jim was the last one to stand in the queue. He knew he didn’t need to bother, as the old crow will be waiting for him. Standing right behind Alisha, the blue eyed fairy, Jim felt privileged. Alisha, the blue eyed fairy, stopped breathing lest the reeking Jim would envelope her in to a disgusting abyss. She ran away from the queue, the moment she came out of the class. Spell bonded Jim’s concupiscent eyes were still following her immaculate shin. Alisha, the blue eyed fairy, was ethereally alluring. The old crow’s caw broke the spell and Jim steered through the students, who were still piercing him with invisible beaks, to the acacia.

For all the students, Jim was a creep. He was their favorite instrument of insidious pleasures. Jim was no less than magnanimous and allowed everyone to soak up every damn pleasure they want. He never complained. He never had any friend. The old crow wasn’t his friend. Jim used to collect variety of slimy insects from the mossy concrete fence of the well and feed the old crow. Jim relished watching the old crow tear those slimy insects off. He never smiled, leave alone the laugh, but he had an insane glow in his eyes while watching the slimy insects wriggling in pain. Nobody followed Jim to the well, as it was his domain. Nobody dared to infiltrate that domain.

The bell rang ominously. “Recess over”, sighed the returning students. They started retreating to the class in a queue, the only difference was Jim; he wasn’t with them. Jim was inside the well clutching the mossy fence with one hand. He was hunting more preys for the crow, consequently for himself. He was entranced by the interior of the well, the cobwebs the stinking dark syrupy water, which engulfed every thing fallen in to it. All the chaos from the outside world subsided as Jim went deeper.

Jim’s absence didn’t stir any restlessness in the school till the evening assembly. Someone, who used to pinch Jim’s *** while standing in assembly, noticed that Jim was missing. Days passed. They were expecting to find his swollen body in the well; they found nothing but the dead old crow on the mossy fence.

Nobody missed Jim in the class, till the day when in recess, Alisha, the blue eyed fairy, was found sitting on the branch of the acacia, eating slimy insects one by one. For the first time nobody obeyed the final toll of the recess bell. The whole school gathered near the acacia, most of them puked. Someone noticed a disgustingly fat crow sitting beside Alisha, the blue eyed fairy, staring at her relishing with an insane glow in those black eyes. A suppressed scream froze everyone. “Jim is back!”

Alisha, the blue eyed fairy, was sent to a mental asylum. Mr. Lohia was paralyzed completely. All the day he used to pee and **** in his pants and stay in that stench till the evening when his wife would clean him off with utter disgust. The school management could not understand the sudden outburst of incomprehensible filthy habits of Jim’s classmates. Soon all of them were accompanying Alisha, the blue eyed fairy, in the asylum.

People consider that autumn a weird one.

Jim has been seen sitting on the mossy fence searching slimy insects. Rumors find there way!!!

dramasnot6
11-28-2006, 04:27 AM
wow....that story was quite something to get through. The exact messages confused me a bit, and i think his relationship with the crow is a bit unclear. i love your use of description in some lines like "irritated, agitated, incited, excited, and delighted ones" and " The afternoon looked like a prisoner through the rusty iron grilled windows. The autumn was shredding through each and every green tree surrounding the school, sucking the chlorophyll from all the greenery and transmuting it to a dull shade of yellow ochre"

Well done!!!

Dry_Snail
11-28-2006, 09:02 AM
Thanks for the feed back. i am happy that u liked reading it.
The relationship between Jim and crow...is it unclear?
Well i might have fallen in love with the obscurity....thanks for pointing it out though....

:)

Dry_Snail
12-04-2006, 08:01 AM
thanks anyways ... :))

Virgil
12-04-2006, 08:14 AM
I was a bit confused by the story when I read it for the competition. I don't have the time to read it again now, but if you want I'll come back to it and re-read it and get more specific.

Dry_Snail
12-04-2006, 09:29 AM
I was a bit confused by the story when I read it for the competition. I don't have the time to read it again now, but if you want I'll come back to it and re-read it and get more specific.

Please....i will be privileged!
:)

Taliesin
12-04-2006, 10:05 AM
We remember that we voted for it because we liked its grotesque tone.

Dry_Snail
12-05-2006, 01:17 AM
We remember that we voted for it because we liked its grotesque tone.

Taliesin....we as in>????