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tear_killer
10-04-2003, 09:59 AM
two little whores,shivering with fright, seek a cosy door way in the middle of the night.Jacks knife flashes, then theres but one and the last one the ripest for Jacks idea for fun.
den
10-06-2003, 07:17 AM
This is a bit ominous and disturbing. The form is weak however, could you not break it up into stanzas? It would have more impact.
Phoenix_Tears
10-06-2003, 09:50 PM
It is a quote by JACK THE RIPPER. One of my idols in a sense.


Sounds Cryptic, but oh well.
-Phoen-x-
den
10-07-2003, 04:17 AM
Oh. It's in the `Personal' poetry section so my mistake, I thought it was something that tear_killer wrote themselves.
Phoenix_Tears
10-07-2003, 07:35 PM
It is quite alright den.

-Phoenx-