Shared HAIKU ! Join in, it's fun!

[den]

Ok, so, I write a haiku, then the next poster uses the last line of myhaiku... k? ;)

Haiku:
1. A Japanese lyric verse form having three unrhymed lines of five, seven, and five syllables, traditionally invoking an aspect of nature or the seasons.

2. A poem written in this form.


what will you become
anything you want to be
Truth in time will tell

[den]

Truth in time will tell
though telling the truth in time
will likely save nine

[AbdoRinbo]

Will likely save nine
Of the truths that were spoken,
Though nothing was said.

[den]

Though nothing was said
I heard loud whispers clanging
oh my hangover

[AbdoRinbo]

Oh my hangover
In hindsight I'd have hidden
And hung over you!

[den]

and hung over you !
creepy big fat black spider
you sleep, mouth agape

[AbdoRinbo]

You sleep, mouth agape
An orchestra in your nose
Leaves me plum-tucker'd

[den]

Leaves, me plum-tuckered (sic)
can't watch `the fall' anymore
it's now september

[AbdoRinbo]

[pfhw! what's all this '(sic)' nonsense?]

It's now september
And I have noticed that den
Still thinks I'm stupid

[den]

still thinks I'm stupid
well now join the club my friend
we're alone, the end

[AbdoRinbo]

We're alone, the end
But then again, that's not true
You've me, and I've you.

[den]

You've me, and I've you
some solace, such a harsh world
this forum bereft

[AbdoRinbo]

This forum bereft
I'm paralyzed with boredom
Truth and time have told.

[AbdoRinbo]

:(

[den]

Truth and time have told
light a spark and catch the fire
burn and rage away

[AbdoRinbo]

Burn and rage away
You might never find God, so
Hold on to someone.

[den]

Hold on to someone
use your hands arms words or heart
intent is deemed good

[AbdoRinbo]

Intent is deemed good
But true intent is absent
I is someone else.

[den]

I is someone else
my cat another being
her licks and purrs soft

[den]

her licks and purrs soft
we won't bite anyone new!
why don't others join? :( :(

[b]

why don't others join?
for this soft and playfull verse
swallows sultriness

[AbdoRinbo]

Swallows sultriness
A skank and salty sickness
To the weakminded

[b]

To the weakminded
Who cannot let flow their thoughts
So they vaporize

[Dyrwen]

So they vaporize,
those in the sun with their minds,
and all were happy

[AbdoRinbo]

And all were happy
Until all the vapor froze
As thoughts sometimes do

[den]

:D

As thoughts sometimes do
Down the pipe and out the ears
Drip drop from your brain

[Dyrwen]

Drip drop from your brain,
the juices leave a blue stain,
on the hearts of rain.

:rolleyes:

[den]

on the hearts of rain
tiny mote of dust in each
i love the rain so

[Dyrwen]

I love the rain so,
it comes with tears happily,
always misting you.

[den]

always misting you
september is here again
hiss and leaves dying

[AbdoRinbo]

Hiss and leaves dying
At the Season's edge of a
Paternal razor

[den]

Paternal razor
aggression and recession
she searches for peace

[Koa]

Wow...I've seen den 'advertising' this thread in other threads, and I thought "wow, interesting"... But by the time I got to read this, I had seen do many posts about this that I didn't even want to see it for spirit of contraddiction...(here I am infact, I even contraddict myself... it must be some kind of art).

And in any case I've never managed to do an haiku, I hate to have to count syllables... And noone ever taught me how the hell to count syllables in English... Oh no, I was taught last year, but I didn't really understand (shameful for a student of English I know)... Only free verse for me please ;)

Am I interrupting the creative game? I apologise.

[Shea]

she searches for peace
it gently disturbs her soul
comfort from the saved.

(religious, I know :rolleyes: )

[b]

she searches for peace
that calms the tree of her mind
lashed by raving wind

postscriptum:

I am afraid that the time difference between Europe and the States excluded me from yesterday's poetical inpulse on this forum. Perhaps we can make rules that enable us to be equally involved in this Haiku game.

postpostscriptum:

Koa: is not very hard to count syllables in English. Just pronounce the words you write, and use your feeling for the English language. If this is to hard for you, you can also transcribe it to the International Phonetic Alphabet - if you have had linguistics. At the moment I am making a metrical translation of Ovidius Metamorphoses (liber III, Narcissus, Echo, Tiresias) in Iambic Pentameters, so let me give you an example (III, 316):

'While this on earth was done by fatefull law'

can be written like:

'Whyl dis on urth was don by f(ae)tfull law'

Which has exactly 10 syllables, this time even iambically ordened. Every syllable is built around one vowel, and can have 'an onset' and a 'coda', consisting of consonants. Some 'vowels' that are in a certain word are not pronounced, or melt together with other phonemes in the text. Just like in Italian:

'Quali fioretti dal notturno gelo'

'Kvvali fjoretti dal notturno gelo'

counts eleven syllables - the Qu combination in Italian forms a consonant, so that the vowel u is not pronounced like in the two syllable word 'Uve'. (It is quite easy to count the syllable's in Dante's Comedia, isn't it?)

I hope - koa - that you did not miss the allusions to your Italian poem that I once read.

[den]

Shea pretty well anything goes here that's the beauty of it! ;) And I wouldn't necessarily call what you wrote `religious' ... The themes of `peace , soul, comfort, saved' are more subjective and spiritual to me, rather than dogmatic.

Koa, aw, :( that's too bad, maybe somebody here can advise you in very simple terms on how to count syllables, but I'm afraid it could be confusing. You write well in english, do you speak it much too? Actually, hang on, when you look in a dictionary, they sometimes break the word down into syllables, for instance from

http://dictionary.reference.com/

syl·la·ble n.

A unit of spoken language consisting of a single uninterrupted sound formed by a vowel, diphthong, or syllabic consonant alone, or by any of these sounds preceded, followed, or surrounded by one or more consonants.

One or more letters or phonetic symbols written or printed to approximate a spoken syllable.

So .". `syllable' as written above with the hyphens has three syllables. Maybe that will help a bit. :)



comfort from the saved
rest my tired head calmly
embrace me my friend

[b]

embrace me my friend
put your arms around my neck
but don't do it twice

[den]

but don't do it twice
can only handle so much
addiction rents hearts

[b]

addiction rents hearts
of hidious old scholars
to children's young mouths

[den]

to children's young mouths
cooked broccoli tastes awful
but I love it raw

:P

[b]

but I love it raw
'cause I'm a cute red bunny
frying in your pan

[den]

bunny? red? :D :P :D

frying in your pan
sweetbreads port wine and garlic
decadence spurs life

[b]

decadence spurs life
as the old feasting Romans
shouted to their slaves

[den]

shouted to their slaves
plantation owners evil
devil incarnate

[b]

devil incarnate
Beelzebub, Lucifer
became friends for life

[AbdoRinbo]

Became friends for life
And the squirrels and the birds came
To sing them a song

[Koa]

Aww guys thanks for the explanations, but Bart's is way too technical...I should know IPA and linguistics and blah, but I find them so dry, I'm much more istinctive so having to translate something in IPA would really put me off....

Maybe I'll try to participate anyway, trying to learn from your haikus how the syllables should be (I'm good at infering things rather than using technical devices). Not now tho, I'm in a rush and that would need thinking...my brain can't make it ;)

Bart, ehm...which hints? Btw I was thinking of revising that poem and post it here... when I'll be out of this working week and be back at the lazy life of a lazy student.

Am I interrupting again? Last time, I promise. (Maybe...;))

[b]

To sing them a song
Twit Twit Twit Jug Jug Jug
Jug Jug Jug Tereu

ps. Koa: you can also just pronounce the line and count the vowels you HEAR, using your fingers... I am looking forward to your read your contributions. And besides: the allusions I made refer to that poem of yours, starting with the line

Come l'albero impassibile

!!!

[AbdoRinbo]

Jug Jug Jug Tereu
You see me and I see you
Anyone seen den?

[b]

Anyone seen den
On Horseback in Amsterdam
Who started this all

[AbdoRinbo]

Who started this all
What sweet Canadian Muse
Has tickled our ears?

[AbdoRinbo]

Has tickled our ears?
You mean the Ice *****? Oh yes,
She comes from the North

[b]

She comes from the North
To freeze our grins, make us ice
And then to crack us

[AbdoRinbo]

And then to crack us
She is side-splitting you know
And she has a whip.

[b]

And she has a whip
To strain her horse when needed
And gallop away

[AbdoRinbo]

And gallop away
Well, not exactly. The whip
Has many uses.

[Shea]

And gallop away
To chase her tresses, all gone
blown off by the wind

(sorry, I just cut 10 inches of my hair)

[b]

Blown of by the wind
That inclines kamikaze
But don't do it twice

[Shea]

But don't do it twice
with an unfamiliar word
the brain gets confused :P

[b]

the brain gets confused
if small things suddenly mean
something different

[Shea]

something different
in the ways that we can speak
all beauty therein

[AbdoRinbo]

All beauty therein
A blister on the eye of
Poetic vision.

[den]

poetic vision
twisted deep and dark, causes
nonsense haiku-ing

:P

[AbdoRinbo]

Nonsense haiku-ing
Well, now there's an idea
I can relate to.

[Shea]

I can relate to
a blanket of snow, so white
experienced not :(

[b]

experienced not
your perception of these things
is alien to mine

[den]

alien to mine
doublespeak twist hidden word
double entendre

[b]

Double entendre
Comme ce est l'echafaud moche,
Hypocrite lecteur

[AbdoRinbo]

Hypocrite lecteur,
Welcome to America
Here, have some french fries.

[b]

Here, have some French fries
A gallon of dirty coke
Breakfast from Iran

[den]

Breakfast from Iran
Naan o paneer o sabzi
succulent kabobs

[Shea]

succulent kabobs
dripping with butter and herbs
charred, mmm, I'm hungry!

[den]

charred, mmm, I'm hungry!
it's breakfast time here again
i crave lots of sweets

[AbdoRinbo]

I crave lots of sweets
A cream sugar kiss. O sweet
Are the sweets of sin.

[Shea]

are the sweets of sin
so alluring to draw on
the pounds, oh! my weight!

[AbdoRinbo]

The pounds, oh! my weight!
The heavy ribald flavor!
Leaves a bitter taste

[AbdoRinbo]

Leaves a bitter taste,
Bitter like a hot tear-drop,
Trickling down your face.

[Shea]

trickling down your face
ink of procrastination
frustrating papers! :evil: :evil:

[Shea]

frustrating papers
Whitman looms over my head
excuse to ignore

[den]

excuse to ignore
reality bites me hard
alone adrift lost

[ihrocks]

Alone adrift lost
Damn Mapquest is wrong again
Whither San Jose?

[Shea]

whither San Jose,
do I know that song of yore?
words lost in my head

[b]

words lost in my head
since for this whole weekending
I shut up my mouth

[AbdoRinbo]

I sometimes . . .

[AbdoRinbo]

I shut up my mouth . . .

[den]

I shut up my mouth
to look behind disappoints
wonder don't ask why

[Shea]

wonder don' t ask why
there was a lull in hikus
I'm glad the lull ends

[AbdoRinbo]

Wonder don't ask why
Who am I inside, outside?
Poor, deaf, dumb and blind.

[For den]

[b]

[Why, AbdoRinbo, have you deleted all your contributions? It might be funny and perhaps even aesthetical to do so, but that changes when we begin a new Haiku-sequence here, instead of creating a new post! How ugly inconsistent!]

[AbdoRinbo]

I hated those posts, I had to get rid of them. I've tried to reinvent who I am in a selfless act of purification. But I'm an idiot to have thought that was ever possible. I'd left a trail of periods (like little crumbs) just in case I lost myself along the way. I've returned.

Inconsistent. Yes! I have no artistic sense, I am not a poet.

Ugly. I'm hideous. I've laughed at other people's misfortunes, almost to the point of death.

I've taken pleasure in destroying poetry, especially my own. (I'd destroy the world, if I could.) Most of all, I am senseless and savage.

I rain black scarlet waste on every parade.

[Munro]

Don't burn the records, then. Keep them so that you can look back upon your metamorphosis in the forums and marvel at your change, whether it was for your better or worse. Even if it is painful to see, at least it's interesting. Otherwise I'd have trashed my journals long ago.

I re-read some of my early day posts...man I was an arrogant, precocious prick. I still am, probably. In a few months time I'll re-read this post with digust, and I'll wretch at my choice of words and my tone.

Oh, sorry...back to your haiku thingy.

[Shea]

poor, deaf, dumb, and blind
are we who see self
as ugly and quite usless

[den]

Indeed I think we all look back on ourselves, our word and deed, and if we didn't feel disgust or some loathing in how we've acted we'd not be human... I can't stand myself sometimes either.

Oh and I have to say, Munro, you broke the rules, the only one being you must post a haiku if you come here, else we'll get the lynch-mob after you! ;)

as ugly and quite useless (that's 7 syllables not 5 shea :P )
the noble savage torments
self admirable

Now cut it out you guys and quit screwing this up! :D :D :P :P :P

[Shea]

*looks back at mistake*
*kicks self for stupidity* :oops: :oops:

self admirable
in light of the passing of
time, from knowledge gained

[b]

[The metamorphosis of our Haiku-sequence, the personal vendetta's, the pretentious synthethis of the visible: everyting is worth preserving, especially if it forms interaction between people and is poetry at the same time. It doesn't matter that you're ashamed of your previous style: it does matter that Nihilists do not only destroy themselves, but also the naive and innocent people around them. Now: I could state that this particular post is dead; even Shea - desillusioned by this foul discussion - made silly mistakes. Let us please continue our Haiku-interaction, but then with a new beginning, in a new post.]

[AbdoRinbo]

Relax, I was really only kidding, Bart. I think it will be ok. Here, I'll even put all of my haikus back up (if I can remember them).

[Mrs. Cat]

time, from knowledge gained
metamorphoses quickly
wisdom soon to be

---

Mrs. Cat

[den]

wisdom soon to be
embrace your cynicism
it will free your mind

[Shea]

it will free your mind
to read with all the fervor
of one who has not

[Jay]

of one who has not
chosen his own way
will we soon know of?

okay, did I get it? I like the idea a lot...
hey, my reply's the 100th one, hope I didn't spoil anyone's intention to become the 100th...

[den]

Hey Jay, great first attempt. However the second line should consist of 7 syllables, you got 5 syllables in all lines instead of just the first and third. Not bad though! Glad you joined :D

[AbdoRinbo]

Do it, Jay. You don't want to piss off the Borg. :evil: :evil: :evil:

[b]

will we soon know of(?)
new people starting new posts
without new replies?

[den]

without new replies?
i can hear carotid hum
silence is profound

[AbdoRinbo]

Silence is profound
It flows through your body like
A .12 gage shotty. :rolleyes: :D

[In memory of Tupac Shakur :P ]

[AbdoRinbo]

A .12 gage shotty
Killuminati, I'll pop
A cap in your ***. :D

[den]

A cap in your ***
need the penultimate bad?
nah, you're too fluffy

[AbdoRinbo]

Nah, you're too fluffy
(Yes, like those Mohair sweaters
You think are so hot.)
:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

[den]

You think are so hot (thanks! :p That's awkward!) :D
words mesmerise hypnotise
clothes external funk

[Isagel]

Clothes external funk
vibrations raise rythm push pulse
reach heart by the eye

[Jay]

Reach heart by the eye
There is not a better thing
That's worth looking for

[Jay]

well, not that I mind, but why do we have two haiku threads?

[Shea]

[that's what I was wondering]

that's worth looking for
a double challenge of thought
keeps us on our toes.

[den]

keeps us on our toes
when whence we came, makes no sense
step out, past regret

[Isagel]

Step out, past regret
the path, cleansed by rain, leads
to the rose garden

[den]

to the rose garden
in the yard, heart body soul
grow and nurture love

[b]

Grow and nurture love
For love is the only thought
That makes any sense

[Ickmeister]

That makes any sense
Emotion beyond compare
Love, Life, needs all met

[Dyrwen]

Love, Life, needs all met
for those that really need it
without it, we last

[Ickmeister]

without it, we last
Ideas of the past lost
although ease comes hence

[den]

although ease comes hence
branches and embracing twigs
lay quiet in leaves

[Jay]

Lay quiet in leaves
Those dreams never fulfilled
Covered with cold snow

[Isagel]

Covered with snow
in my garden, all things rest
under white blankets

[Jay]

Under white blankets
Lies a little weakened child
Maybe you know him?

[Ickmeister]

Maybe you know him?
nearly lost the will, near death
snow keeps pouring plain

[Jay]

Snow keeps puring plain
While you watch them all leave
Never turning back

[Sindhu]

Never turning back
Closing open doors today
Soft petals fall fast.

[b]

Soft petals fall fast,
As the autumn embraces
Smooth slumbering love.

[den]

Smooth slumbering love
my cat's unconditional
all we ever need

[Sindhu]

All we ever need
The heartbeats' steady whisper
Promising an end.

[Jay]

Promising an end
Sometimes temptating idea
An easy way out

[b]

An easy way out
If verses make you weary
Just change the subject

[Jay]

Just change the subject
Get out of the room, go out
Even if it's cold

[b]

Even if it's cold
Watery air in Holland,
Raining meager tears

[den]

Raining meager tears
can't imagine dutch crying
it's a place i love

[b]

It's a place I love
Now spammed by Latin Poets,
Not by Ovid though.

[Ickmeister]

Not by Ovid Though
I know not this Ovid one
Seems Important though

[eshcolit]

Seems important though
i do not know the truth now
forever seeking

[den]

forever seeking
but not exactly finding?
innerward eye knows

[Ickmeister]

Innerward eye knows
And to outterward eyes flow
compassionate grace

[b]

Compassionate grace:
Lumbs of meat swing as the dog
Begs for more to eat

[Isagel]

Begs for more to eat
once fed, the stray dog will starve
if the feeding stops.

[Shea]

if the feeding stops
we cease to post. How can we
know what happened then?

[Shea]

know what happened then
to the forum members who
are gone? Hope they're safe!

[ Sorry to leave you with a bad ending line :oops: ]

[den]

are gone? Hope they're safe!
is a sincere sentiment
when lost and confused :(


(`s ok, there have been worse lines Shea ;) :D )

[AbdoRinbo]

When lost and confused,
Once I looked to charity
For deliverance.

[If you can't figure out how things turned out, I'm failing even more than I did then.]

[Shea]

for deliverance
we must hunger and thirst, and
truth will set us free

[fayefaye]

truth will set us free
but sometimes i still feel trapped
in this stupid world

[Shea]

in this stupid world
of the twilight zone. Now I'm
a senior member!:D

[b]

A senior member
What kind of nonsense is this?
No apple nor man!

[Ickmeister]

No apple nor man
Man nor beast, ape nor monkey
is so totally

[Shea]

is so totally
bizzare the world in which we
live? No, we're unique!

[Ickmeister]

live? No, we're unique!
You peeked, through the torn curtain
Awe, grace, power, light

[fayefaye]

Awe, grace, power, light
I see it all and nothing
at all. i can't count.

[fayefaye]

at all. i can't count
counting syllables on my
fingers. for shame. word. :)

fingers. for shame. word.
try to think of excellent
line for next person.

[den]

line for next person
box for ideology
time to make own rules

[b]

Line for next person
Disgusting how this silk form
Attractes emptiness

[Shea]

acttracts emptiness
like paper to my words. My
pen always runs dry

[fayefaye]

pen always runs dry
trees killed needlessly for my
for my thoughts, ideas

[=Monkey_King=]

For my thoughts, ideas
For how long i have fought
Only to change them :o

[Shea]

only to change them
and then to change the world! But
I'm too weak to lead

[=Monkey_King=]

I'm too weak to lead
Energy rushing through me
Only to die again

[den]

:confused:

Only to die again (that's six syllables ;) )
I thought it was all ok
twist my gut, heart pounds


:(

[den]

:(
twist my gut, heart pounds
reversing comfy-ness, now
lone... try, suspend fear
:confused:

[Shea]

lone... try, suspend fear
then friends gather to support
We can all go on!

[den]

We can all go on!
when the `we' synchronises
serendipitous

[couldn't help it, HAD to try a five vowel word for once :p ]

[Shea]

serendipitous,
sounds like that New York cafe
with monster sundaes

[Isagel]

With monster sundaes
like Godzilla vanilla
with cherry on top?

[nicholasburrus]

The end

[den]

sickly sweet between
my brain is turning to mush
help me sustain hope
:confused: :mad: :( :confused:

[b]

help me sustain hope
so get away from this crap,
start thinking yourself.

[bye.]

[Blade]

start thinking yourself
take charge of your own ideas
forge a unique path

[den]

forge a unique path
regardless of others' spite
tendrils of shared love

[bbq13]

why don't others join
join me in my quest for truth
to find you somewhere

[nicholasburrus]

a real Haiku has 5 sylables to begain and end and never over 32 lines

[den]

nicholas! You're also supposed to take the last line of previous person's haiku and make your own, why don't you try? :D

to find you somewhere
somewhere unreal yet truthful
impossibly lost :(

[fayefaye]

impossibly lost
and yet I still search for you
off the beaten track

[AbdoRinbo]

Off the beaten track,
She lay, rotting, dead behind
The railroad bridges.

[Stanislaw]

The railroad bridges.
Undieing lasting untamed
Reaching for the sky.

[bbq13]

reaching for the sky
i call out your name my love
oh, i've waited long...

[Stanislaw]

oh i've waited long
why have you forsaken me
free me from this life

[fayefaye]

free me from this life
I can fly away from here
Free among the stars.

[azmuse]

free among the stars;
we still on planets can yet
explore them in dreams

[Stanislaw]

explore them in dreams
walk amoung them in the night
touch them with thine heart.

[den]

touch them with thine heart
teeth and tissue forever
with insouciance BE

[AbdoRinbo]

With insouciance, BE.
Gush of jouissance; swelling tide;
Tumbling, shoreless sea.

[ColonelKorn]

Tumbling, shoreless sea.
Heath and lone, tossed waves discuss
I've an arm, do you?

[Stanislaw]

I've an arm do you
with what do I write to you
I have the answer.

*does any one know what that thing that is like a Haiku but longer is called?*

[Isagel]

I have the answer
the snow wrote it on my tounge
letters white on white

(thanks for a good starting line - and Hi ColonelKorn , I liked your Haiku)

[azmuse]

letters white on white
purple turkeys satiate
and please my belly

[bbq13]

and please my belly...
forget all heart and thy mind
you make me happy

[Ickmeister]

you make me happy
feel like the trees... so sappy
Life pair, we share... life

[azmuse]

Life pair, we share...life
Darkness too bright to conceal
shadows raining down

[azmuse]

Stanislaw, the tanka poem (waka) has 2 lines of 7 syllables; rengas have 5/7/5/7/7

[den]

shadows raining down
anxiety suppurates
bind, cleave the tension

[subterranean]

bind, cleave the tension
with whom i share
this endless mourn?


(hope that's a Haiku)

[azmuse]

this endless mourn? why
do you cackle as you heat
that ancient cauldron?

[azmuse]

:) nice sig, subT...Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays to you (all) as well

[azmuse]

that ancient cauldron?
...simmers Succulent Innards
for holidays feasts...

(sooo Gross, but i couldn't resist (teeheehee))

[Ickmeister]

for holiday feasts...
greasy goose and ham, and yams
Merry Christmass all!

[Smae]

Burn and rage away
take me into your love spell
here is my number

[fayefaye]

here is my number
call me when you can to meet
under starlit sky

[fayefaye]

under starlit sky
somnambulistic wander
Through the cold, dark night

[atiguhya padma]

Through the cold, dark night
Life experience dying
Loneliness for me

[atiguhya padma]

Loneliness for me:
Vast expanse of starlit sky,
Distance between us

[azmuse]

Distance between us
teardrops fall and sing on rocks
messengers of love

[atiguhya padma]

Messengers of love
Swim subterranean streams
Old ancestral ways

[den]

Old ancestral ways
innate instinct sacrifice
weeping, cleave my life


<atiguhya padma you've got lovely way with words ;) >

[atiguhya padma]

Weeping, cleave my life
Endless scope of entropy
Movement, suffering

[den]

Movement, suffering
my Jaded Tower becons
autopsied psyche

[azmuse]

autopsied psyche
reveals flying mermaids and
singing butterflies

[surf boy]

Singing butterflies
Put speakers in birdcages
To distract our ears.

[azmuse]

To distract our ears
Scarves dipped in chocolate whisper
Decadent secrets.

[surf boy]

'Decadent secrets',
She says, though, I think the world
Will catch on someday.

[atiguhya padma]

SOLAR POWER

Will catch on someday
When all earth's blood escapes through
Evaporation

[atiguhya padma]

Evaporation
Life rising high, bearing down
Precipitation

[serpico]

Precipitation
From our kitchen glitters in
The dishwater light.

[azmuse]

the dishwater light
lures me to tasty morsels -
charred, stinkin' chitlins

[fayefaye]

charred, stinkin' chitins
nothing to eat, slowly starve
die a bit inside


<can you eat chitins? They're like fungi, aren't they? Unless it's supposed to be chitlins, in which case, what are chitlins??? *blushing emoticon*>

[azmuse]

<...they're pork innards (small intestines); black folk ate them in antebellum America, and some still do so, frying them up with a "mess of collard greens" and the like. apparently they smell horrific - i don't know how they taste (and don't want to - fortunately Dad's family didn't eat them); i do have a friend, though, who eats chitterlings (chitlins) out of respect on holidays, to pay her dues and respect to an older generation that was once happy to have anything to put into their stomachs.>

[azmuse]

*later...

hey, thanks for sending me to the dictionary re: chitins...I like "chiton", too (tunic more than mollusk)

[b]

Die a bit inside
When the bow of Legolas
Penetrates my sight

[azmuse]

penetrates my sight
penetrates my - oh dear can't
tell hubby, can i

(roflmao)

[b]

Tell hubby, can I
She said and she took the bait
And entered the cave

[b]

And entered the cave,
Descended in the darkness,
And was enlightened.

[azmuse]

and was enlightened;
legolas shot true & tore
deceit asunder

[b]

Deceit, asunder
Echo of his the muddy pool
That deceived his eyes

[azmuse]

that deceived the eyes
fortunately he was stopped
reason: DUI

[b]

[What does DUI mean? Is this some kind of phonetic game, or what? Besides: why fortunately? Who began? I or thou?]

Reason: DUI
But it was a hunting game,
Quite dimensionless.

[azmuse]

driving under the influence - here in the states you can lose your license for such a thing, go to jail, pay thousands of $'s - which is nice, because it preserves lives that otherwise you might've/could've taken

[b]

Then my reply is quite beautiful, don't you think so?

[azmuse]

quite dimensionless
and so, drunken, they for aimed
themselves on purpose

*by way of an answer, with slurred phrasing

[b]

Themselves on purpose
Plunged in fickle misery
And thus Big White Boy

... Take 2, Thank you...

And thus Big White Boy
- running towards Jack Foley -
Fell and shot himself

[reference to "out of sight"]

[azmuse]

ok...but don't forget "themselves on purpose"
Take 2!!!

[azmuse]

oh crap, you posted!!! "Take 2." must drink more tea and open window. thank goodness for new CO detector, know is simply sleepiness/not poison

GET YOUR CO DETECTORS!

little PSA *public service announcement

[azmuse]

fell and shot himself
out of the cannonball towards
starlit clouds and dreams

[b]

starlit clouds and dreams
Where one exotic woman
Softly strokes the moon

[azmuse]

softly strokes the moon
tells it: run away! - lest you
succumb to earth's schemes

[atiguhya padma]

Succumb to Earth's schemes
Adonis blood crop scattered
To reap good harvest

Originally, I had the last line read 'ensures good harvest', but on reflection decided this was easier to continue.

[azmuse]

pish! who cares!! which ending do YOU like better?

[atiguhya padma]

Now I think about it, I prefer the one I posted (To reap good harvest). So that settles it then.:)

[atiguhya padma]

To reap good harvest:
Leave poor words and thoughts of love.
Behave with great care

[azmuse]

behave with great care
heard children smile today they
stilled they moved my heart

[den]

stilled they moved my heart
dying they bored me to tears
dead I get last laugh

[azmuse]

dead i get the last laugh
shamed i offered myself as
suttee on his pyre

[den]

suttee on his pyre
I'll BE all the way with you
if only you felt

[Polydeuces]

If only you felt
The wretched pain of my soul;
The wine of my grief

["wretched" can be pronounced with two syllables, can't it?]

[den]

indeed, wretched is two syllables ...

[atiguhya padma]

The wine of my grief
Flows deep as arctic water
Underneath Franklin

[atiguhya padma]

Underneath Franklin
Lie a million lifefull forms
Swimming eagerly