Phoenix_Tears
06-22-2003, 11:30 PM
I am trying to decide what to do with this poem. i need to know if it is good or not. if not i chuck it and start anew. if so, then i keep it and revise it
The music you write on my heart
Might give others a startled start
But they'd never understand
The love we share
Dare they even try to compare
For our love is stronger than love itself
This is a love that will never be put on a shelf
When i am not with you my thoughts are
When i am with you my thoughts are afar
I lose my mind when i am in your arms
I lose my arms when i am not in your arms
Is it not about time that i tell you so
If i do how will it go?
Give me a chance, and i'll give you my every breath
I'll give you my heart til my death
-------- Entitled "Our Love"
PLEASE WRITE SOME FEEDBACK PLEASE!!!! DO NOT JUST READ IT AND NOT REPLY. I AM IN EARNEST....... cry
The music you write on my heart
Might give others a startled start
But they'd never understand
The love we share
Dare they even try to compare
For our love is stronger than love itself
This is a love that will never be put on a shelf
When i am not with you my thoughts are
When i am with you my thoughts are afar
I lose my mind when i am in your arms
I lose my arms when i am not in your arms
Is it not about time that i tell you so
If i do how will it go?
Give me a chance, and i'll give you my every breath
I'll give you my heart til my death
-------- Entitled "Our Love"
PLEASE WRITE SOME FEEDBACK PLEASE!!!! DO NOT JUST READ IT AND NOT REPLY. I AM IN EARNEST....... cry